Wednesday, October 08, 2008
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How I Made a Dying Woman Cry...
Guest post from RT_184
During the summer of my university years I'd always be back at my parents place doing nothing. One weekend my mother asked me to go to this woman's house to help her with her lawn. I agreed, and went round the next afternoon.
I biked round to the house. It was a pretty big detached house, nothing too fancy but you can tell she was a rich woman. I press the doorbell and after about two minutes an extremely thin and frail woman answers the door wearing dark sunglasses and with her bald head wrapped in a long scarf.
She apologized for the time it took to answer the door, we shook hands and I walked in. Within 30 seconds I can tell she has money. She clears her throat and introduces herself as Beth. She then takes me to her patio where her garden was. The garden was pretty big but wouldn't of taken anymore than 45 minutes to mow but the grass really wasn't that long and just wasn't worth mowing it right then.
"Thanks for coming to help me mow my lawn" she said.
"Umm.. well.. to be honest Beth, it's really not worth me mowing the lawn right now. The grass is still pretty short. How about I come back and do it another day? When it gets longer."
"Why would you say that?..... it's quite long."
"Really, Beth, it isn't. I promise I'll come back when it gets a bit longer?"
"Haha! You're just afraid that you'll catch what I've got." She snapped.
"Not at all Beth..."
"Well it's cancer and it's not contagious!!"
"I really don't care what you have... but it really just ain't worth mowing. I'll come back next week, ok?"
"Whatever, just ... get the f*ck out of my house!"
But I didn't.
Now, being a student I wasn't really a sensitive person. I offered to mow her lawn for free and this is how she treats me? I looked into her eyes because I was going to give her a piece of my mind about how I didn't like her attitude.
But I didn't.
I didn't look into her eyes, I looked into her soul and...this is going to sound odd, but in a strange way I felt her pain. Through her skin and eyes you could tell that this was a once gorgeous woman. Now she is a frail little skeleton with skin.
I stared at her for about five seconds without speaking. (Five seconds is a long time when you are looking into a persons eyes and not saying anything).
And I don't know what possessed me to do what I did. But my body was just on autopilot, I leaned in and hugged her. Oddly she didn't resist and hugged me back. She started to cry her eyes out. As much as I hate to admit this, tears just uncontrollably rolled out of my eyes too. I have no idea why.
So there we stood on her patio, hugging and crying on each other for a good five minutes. During that time she started praying, thanking God.
When we finished our hug, we wiped each others tears and laughed in embarrassment.
"Why were you praying?" I asked.
"I was thanking God. I prayed for a hug."
"Uhh? Huh?????"
"It's been over a year since... I've been... hugged..."
"You're kidding me?"
"No. Ever since this started... I have nobody, no friends, no time..." she said while laughing and crying at the same time.
We went inside and sat down at the kitchen table and she went on to explain that ever since she was diagnosed with cancer, her husband left for another woman and all her friends forgot about her because she's always going to doctors or feels like crap.
I hung out for an hour or so just chatting to her. She was so hungry for conversation and attention that I actually felt sorry for her. Usually I wouldn't give any of my time, but this was different. Her life was pure hell and it was ending in the crappiest way possible.
She had about two months left...I saw her one last time before she passed.
That day, was one of the greatest things I've ever done. I couldn't save her from dying, I couldn't take away all the pain she was feeling both physically and mentally, I couldn't change her past but what I could do was give a dying woman a hug and a shoulder to cry on.
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Comments (38)
Sometimes a hug is everything.
"Her life was pure hell and it was ending in the crappiest way possible."
It would appear not.
wow, that's one of the most incredible stories i've ever heard. that's amazing, and i agree with the person above me: a hug to some people really is everything.
It is about the little things in our eyes but in God's eyes, His plan, can mean so much more. Faithfulness. I praise God you took the time! It can encourage us all to listen more with the little promptings we get from so many possible sources God uses!
That's beautiful. Thanks for sharing.
what an awesome and touching story. Sometimes we don't even realize how the smallest things mean so much, and in todays day and age, kindness is a thing long forgotten. You did such a great thing for her, and you should feel really great about that. A little bit of kindness goes along way.
...wasn't this done by RT_184 with a different title? Oh yes, it was!
His blogs are so dirty, and now revelife is linking to them!
heh.
@theblackspiderman@xanga - it says at the top that it's a guest post from RT_184...
this is lovely thanks for sharing!
@theblackspiderman@xanga - why can't God use the foolish things of the world to confound the wise? ;)
This brought tears to my eyes.
@shanella - Of course He can! But RT is REALLLY dirty.
God bless you, you deserve so much for that !!
this story is beautiful, it touched my heart, wow, thanks so much <3
This is one of the most touching stories i've ever read.
"A hug is a great gift, one size fits all, and no one minds if you exchange it."
Love that saying.
that was really...wow.
:) thank you.
I loved the story, thank you so much for sharing!
What an amazing moment...it touched me to read it.
This was beautiful.
Thank you for doing that. I watched both my parents slowly die of cancer, and I know how much what you did for her that day must have meant to her.
God bless you.. it's always a hard thing for people who are dying to cope, and it's always wonderful when someone goes out of their way to help them and let them know their worth, and that somehow they are loved.
Very touching....yes, when illness comes, friends do fall away, because they don't want to be reminded of their own mortality, their own frailty, nor do they want to keep hearing about your health and the doctors and how you feel like crap all the time. She was right on about that. A hug was what she needed most - and someone to take the time to look into her soul and feel her pain with her.
i kind of miss hugs.. it seems that people in my church are so reserved nowadays that a hug is preposterous..
i once worked on the property of a woman who was dying of breast cancer known as "Project Judy." i didnt understand why my boss and coworker always bitched about her until i had to go there and work on her rosebushes. damn lady kept asking us to do random shit for little or no extra money and then asked me to crawl under her rosebush to cut the start of a barely visible vine... i still have the scars about a year later. cant say i felt bad for her after that...
beautiful. you did the right thing. that's all I can say.
hah it made me cry =( a hug can mean so much when you REALLY need it, it's awesome you got to answer someone else's prayers