Monday, 21 January 2013
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What Everyone Should Know About Pornography
I knew I would have to write about this sooner or later because it’s an issue that I’ve not only struggled with personally but I know millions of other guys do as well, whether they admit it or not. It took all of God’s strength to write about it today, but I wanted to share my experience with porn.Before I was a Christian, I thought to myself porn is perfectly normal and natural. I mean, we’re guys, right? We have needs, right? I was exposed to porn at a very early age -- when I was only 12 years old. My step-dad hid Playboys under the sink and bed and I would go in there and look at them. When I first saw them I thought to myself, holy moly this is different!
As years passed, I would delve in and out of porn, and in high school my friends would even come over and we’d watch porn together. It was practically a porn party! Well, I eventually became a Christian and all of a sudden I became hugely convicted when I watched porn. What was once so innocent now felt like I was guilty almost to point of committing a serious crime, and I was, in God’s eyes.
Many of you are wondering why I think porn is bad. I’ll first attack it from a non-Christian viewpoint. When a guy watches porn, he is basically imagining that he is sleeping with another woman. It’s a ridiculous fantasy played out in the privacy of a person’s home and this problem isn’t isolated to males either, statistics prove that more and more women are watching porn as well.
Now, if you're in a relationship, would you want your boyfriend or girlfriend watching another man or woman have sex while they play out this ‘fantasy’ in their head? Of course not! This might not seem to bother the other person in the relationship, but it’s a seed of destruction that will grow more and more. From that seed can come several things -- lack of trust, feeling unloved -- the most prevalent and often final conclusion being that he or she cheats on you. Another point to consider is that most males will never admit they have porn. Porn is always done secretly.
From a Christian standpoint, God calls Christians to fix our thoughts on things that embody him. Jesus said, “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.” Philippians 4:8
God also calls us not to lust. When guys watch porn they are practicing to lust after women. It’s a fact I know all too well and eventually it spills out and affects the people you love most. I’m still learning to fill myself with God and to avoid porn at all costs.
I put up Norton software that blocks all porn and sexual material, and I also have it on my phone. Some people might think I’m crazy but I take it seriously because I’m not only accountable to God for my actions but I also have a person I love with all my heart who deserves eyes only for her.
Porn is an issue that many people don’t like to talk about and often ignore. It’s a huge problem in today’s society that we must address now before it’s too late. With divorce so prevalent, I have no doubt that pornography plays an important role in this.
Men need to step up and be the father, friend, husband, and Christian leader that God desires of each of us. On a side note, if it wasn’t for my girlfriend’s grace, love, and patience, I would be single today. She is an amazing woman who has a heart for God and makes me a better person because of it. Thanks sweety!
What other problems does pornography cause in the mind and heart? For those who struggle with pornography, what are some action steps they can take to begin to free themselves from this addiction?
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About the Author
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- From: healingfromgod
- Name: healingfromgod
- About Me: Hey everyone! I'm a college student in my last year and going to be applying to medical schools and PA schools soon. For most of my life I wasn't a Christian because of the difficulties/trials in my life. God brought me here to California (from chilly cold Wisconsin) and it was there where I found God. I'm grateful to learn from other fellow Christians on here and share our experiences. http://healingfromgod.com
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Comments (74)
If your righthand offend you,cut it off;
Men do need to step up, good for you having a strong viewpoint!
"Now, if you're in a relationship, would you want your boyfriend or girlfriend watching another man or woman have sex while they play out this ‘fantasy’ in their head?"
This does not address those who are single; further, I feel many would agree with this sentiment.
"Another point to consider is that most males will never admit they have porn. Porn is always done secretly."
This is clearly false since you and your friends had porn parties. Hard to not admit you all watch porn in such situations.
@Lovegrove@xanga - I greatly think that we misinterpret that verse now-a-days. Honestly face the question ---- Does your RIGHT HAND cause you to sin? Jesus said plainly --- "From out of THE HEART proceeds all manner of evil." (paraphrasing the verses found in Matthew 15) and even a casual review of scripture will show you that God's not talking about your emotions... but your mind. (one of the clearest evidences of that is the very passage I just quoted --- for out of the heart proceed evil THOUGHTS.... since when do we think with our emotions?)
If your right hand causes you to sin... but it's not our hands that cause us to sin... so where's the chopping to be done?
Romans 12:1-2..... Philippians 4:8..... Psalm 119:9,11.... Psalm 1:1-6....
Once we face the fact that the very thoughts and imaginations of all that we do are evil (Genesis 6:11-12; Jeremiah 17:9-10), through and through, only then can we seek the only cure that God provides or offers ----
Create in me a clean heart, and renew a right spirit within me. (Psalm 51:10-12)
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ he is a new creation, behold the old things have passed away and the new has come. (2 Corinthians 5:17-18)
and most beautifully ----
For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men. It teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age, while we wait for the blessed hope (Titus 2:11-13)
If your right hand offends thee ---- seek the grace of God that teaches us to say "No"... renewing our minds... creating a new spirit within us.... that we might ultimately please Him who calls us onward.
amen?
@JulieMillerFan@xanga - Men took that verse literally, and who are we to say they were wrong, and some cut their testicles off before entering a life of monastic prayer. Not everyone did it of course, just those who felt they needed to in order to avoid temptation.
The question of what is to be taken literally or not is an ongoing debate in Christian and Jewish circles. Moslem circles too but they are not so advanced in the debate as the former.
Jesus said it; so maybe Christians should consider castration a virtue.
@Lovegrove@xanga - But again --- Jesus did point out clearly that the root of our sin was not in our hands or our eyes.... but in something far more keen to our prideful arrogance. Indeed, Origen castrated himself to obey the command (if indeed it is seen as a "command") but I honestly doubt that kept him free from the temptation of lust which flows out of .... TA-DA.... an evil heart.
@JulieMillerFan@xanga - Jesus said a lot of things and it is speculation as to whether to take a particular one literally or not.
I look forward to a similar post for women regarding trashy erotica, and novels like Fifty Shades of Grey.
@Lovegrove@xanga - In a very general sense, everything is interpretation and historically speaking it seems that a lot of what Jesus and the ancient Christians preached and focused on was quite different from what today's modern churches preach. Ancient Christians focused more on hospitality as morality while today we view morality based on sexuality (According to Bass).
@Lovegrove@xanga - "If your righthand offend you,cut it off;"
If you take everything in the Bible literally, then you will find that there are a number of contradictions within the text. That is why it is important to figure out what the actual text said and maybe even more importantly, the context to which it was said in.
It is also very easy for us to take our 'modern' view on things and retrospect them to the past, that simply distorts the actual truth.
@thirst2@xanga -
"This does not address those who are single; further, I feel many would agree with this sentiment."
I agree, the post was geared more towards those in a relationship.
"Another point to consider is that most males will never admit they have porn. Porn is always done secretly."
This is clearly false since you and your friends had porn parties. Hard to not admit you all watch porn in such situations.
I should have been more clear in this post when I wrote it awhile back. Making the distinction of admission or confession in this context, is admitting it is a problem. "Porn parties" and freely talking about it in this context was not admitting you have a problem.
If I had to rephrase this I would have said:
What I mean here (should have been more clear), pornography is OFTEN (this is not inclusive) done in isolation and the confession that it is a problem is OFTEN difficult by males because the consequences don't always manifest themselves right away and often in very indirect ways as well.
@JulieMillerFan@xanga - It is kind of ironic if Origen actually did this because he mentions alegorical reading and thought that people who take the bible ONLY literally or historically were simple minded.
"When a guy watches porn, he is basically imagining that he is sleeping with another woman."
I'm sure men everywhere will thank you for speaking on their behalf. Clearly you know exactly what runs through each and every man's mind when he watches porn.
@chronic_masticator@xanga -
I'm assuming your being sarcastic? I'll probably should have edited the original post to not make so many generalized assumptions and just share my own experience.
I originally wrote about my daily thoughts on a post on healingfromgod.com
I have since removed it, I ended up really hurting my girlfriend (obviously) and I have nothing but gratitude for how much grace she has given me through the sharing of my personal experiences.
@healingfromgod - ....what?
@QuantumStorm@xanga - Amen. In my view, those things are also porn, but the church has no articulated definition of what constitutes porn for most women.
god this and god that, cant you people think for yourselves. theres nothing wrpng with porn when viewed in moderation.
@healingfromgod - You also edited your comment. GG.
@AJDaemon@xanga - So by considering pornography as morally wrong you assume those who do can't think for themselves?
@chronic_masticator@xanga - Yes, I was just trying to clarify and see what you were trying to say, thats all :).
@healingfromgod - not when your just regurgitating other peoples nonsense.
@healingfromgod - Historically, yes Origen did castrate himself. His reasoning was to better serve his Lord without distraction. I say..... lust isn't in the penis, it's in the brain.
@AJDaemon@xanga - What 'nonsense' are you referring to?
@AJDaemon@xanga - I can't find your original comment, did you delete it? I also don't mind having a discussion, especially hearing other people's beliefs that are different from my own. However, when you make references such as, "regurgitating other peoples nonsense," it makes it difficult to discuss things.
If I remember correctly, you thought basically that people who think pornography is wrong don't think for themselves? Could you please elaborate more and explain how you arrived at that conclusion?
@healingfromgod - Viewing morality primarily via sexuality is certainly a problem for religious people.