Friday, 16 March 2012
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Me and My Muslim Girlfriend: Searching for God's True Word
By "Oneshotblogger"
Last month I was sitting in church with my girlfriend. It was very quiet and warm in the church. Everything was at peace. We sat in one of the pews, holding hands and enjoying the silence. My girlfriend turned towards me and whispered: "I have wish."
"You have a wish?" I asked.
"Yes, wish," she answered. English is not her first language.
"What do you wish?"
"I wish this moment is never stop."
"Me too," I said, "We're in a church. Let's pray and ask Jesus to not ever let this moment stop."
"Okay," she said. She put her hands together and said: "Mr. Jesus, please, make this moment forever and never stop."
I started laughing despite myself. "Mr. Jesus." It was so cute! At that moment I realized, like a bolt of white light, that I was in love with my girlfriend. I loved her. I loved her passionately and I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her.
Of course the moment in the church did not last forever. After about a half hour we got up and left. She went back to work and I returned to the clinic where I had my afternoon shift.
Still, that white light moment that appeared in my head while my girlfriend and I were in church stayed with me all that day. I have no doubt that God was speaking to me, telling me of my love for my girlfriend.
There are many people, however, who disapprove of my relationship with my girlfriend. I am a Christian and she is a secular Muslim whose family is from Kazakhstan. My girlfriend goes to church services with me and I sort of know that she only does so to please me -- not because she actually believes that Jesus Christ is her Lord and Saviour.
I do the same sort of thing. When we went to visit her family in Astana during the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, I also attended services with her parents. I fasted with them from sunrise to sunset, not because I believe in Islam but because I owed respect towards the parents of the girl I was dating. When I spoke to my girlfriend's parents, I knew within my heart that their souls were just as sincere and intact and full of love as any Christian.
It makes me sad when my relationship is condemned by people who are in my church. The Bible is quoted as proof that interfaith relationships are inappropriate. I know that the Bible is the Word of God -- but it is the Word of God spoken through the mouths of men. The Bible has been translated from Aramaic to Hebrew to English throughout the millennia. The Word of God has been filtered through the minds and pens of countless scholars.
God's Word still shines through the pages of the Bible, but it is like viewing shining light through a grimy window pane. For example, what does Exodus 20: 4-5 mean when God says "I am a jealous god" ? What does He mean by using the article "a" before "god?" That implies that He is one of many gods, but God is the only God. There are no others. Also, why is God jealous? Why does he commit that sin? Isn't God perfect in His Essence? Why would He be susceptible to the sin of jealousy?
And later on in the Book of Exodus, why does God who is so offended by abortion nowadays showing no pity towards the innocent lives of the Egyptian first-born? And in the Book of Job why does God torture Job over a cruel curiosity about what would make the poor man break? Incidences and contradictions like these seem like chinks and cracks in translation that have come about only through the fallibility of imperfect scholarship by imperfect men -- not God.
There are, however, many passages in the Bible where I see a closer version of the pure light of God shining through the letters. My favorite quote is Luke 6:29: "And unto him that smiteth thee on the one cheek offer also the other; and him that taketh away thy cloke forbid not to take thy coat also" The necessity of kindness even towards those who are cruel to you seems closer to the nature of God, in my opinion, than a thousand words necessitating the stoning of idolators.
Nevertheless God is often used by men as an excuse for sinful behavior. In the early seventeenth century local colonial officials in Massachusetts would abuse the name of God by proclaiming a few landowners "witches" and offenders of all that was holy. These landowners were condemned in kangaroo courts and put to death. The local government would then seize their property... which was, of course, the government's intention in the first place. Even today I see officials commit the sins of the Pharisees by speaking out of both corners of their mouths. They proclaim their devotion to Jesus Christ... and then use the name of the Prince of Peace as a justification to go to war and commit great violence for the government's own benefit.
When I see this occur I feel so sad inside. It is the duty of every good Christian, in my opinion, to try to separate the true shining light of God's Word from the dirt smears of man's sinful nature cleverly masquerading as the Word of God. It is so difficult, however, to experience God's Word and know that it is untouched by the sins of the men who translate for Him. I don't know exactly how to recognize when I am experiencing God's true wisdom and when I am experiencing the normal, mortal sinful words of men that pretend to be repeating the Word of God. It is difficult.
I think that quiet moment in the church when, with a great bolt of light inside my head, I knew that I was with the woman that I wanted to marry -- I think that was the closest I ever got to experiencing the true Word of God. I have, in my interfaith relationship, never felt more holy.
What are your thoughts on this man's search for God's true Word? How are we to handle scripture if it is, in fact, so tainted by the hands of man? Is the Bible really as fallible as this author suggests?
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Comments (85)
You're going to marry this woman with you being Christian and her being Muslim? How will you raise your kids? Maybe it will somehow work out for you but it seems like eventually there will be more problems because of it. Your "feelings" of love you have now, won't necessarily get you through those times. Bottom line is that it's your choice. Good luck.
The jealousy of God is a righteous jealousy--if some guy tried to seduce your girlfriend, you would get jealous and try to protect her, right? If it didn't bother you at all, it means you don't care that much about her. God is jealous for us--we belong to Him, and He loves us and wants to protect us from false "gods" that can't satisfy.
If you do get married to your girlfriend, there will probably be complications later on...if you have children, how are you going to raise them up? In Islam or Christianity? Also, do you believe that Jesus is the only way to God? Since you seem to have a lot of questions, try reading and studying some theology...J.I. Packer's "Knowing God" is a good start.
This is one of the most brave posts I've read in the history of Rev Life. Even though I may not agree with certain things you've written, I think it's important for you to focus on who Jesus is, as opposed to what Muslims think who Jesus was (and whether he died or not).
I would like the post to be more about the interfaith relationship you have with one another, more than the issues you have with the Bible. I mean you could have the same issues with the Quran as well.
I wish you and your girl friend the best.
You claim your Christian which means Christ follower. Yet your words reveal doctrine that is not Christian and that wherever you attend church they are not teaching you the word of God. You come across very naive and ignorant of what it means to be a Christian. All you have to do is read your bible with the right searching attitude.Here is a link that explains some basic Christian beliefs for you to investigate further:
http://www.lavistachurchofchrist.org/LVSermons/CanWeTrustTheBible.htm
2nd Timothy 3:16-All scripture is God Breathed. If all scripture is God breathed that means god breathed through the prophets to write things down word for word. If you believe there is a God that made everything, don't you think, that God is magnificent enough to get an uncorrupted love letter, the bible, to mankind? Is there even just one man on earth that can decide which mistake is accurately mistaken? You cannot pick and choose cafeteria style what you do and do not believe in the bible. You either believe God or you do not believe Him. There is no compromise on this matter.
Find a church with good fellowship of friends that can teach you and desciple you biblical Christianity quickly. Otherwise you will flounder and die. You need to feed on the word of God or you will die spiritually if you haven't already.
Also, you will have problems when your deciding what religion your children will be raised. Christians believe Muslims are not saved-They are not Christ-followers. They do not believe Christ was as christ claimed-the son of God. Is she going to let you raise the children Christian? I think not.
Scripture warns Christians to not be yoked with unbelievers and that also includes marriage. 2ndCo 6:14.
Commenters are haters.... this is why I have had to sit down and re-evaulate whether or not I want to be considered a Christian anymore even though I adhere to the spirit and the beliefs and the ethics stated in the bible.... I hate Christians who judge you for what you do, how you do it, or what you like-- everyone sins, being sinless is Mr. Jesus' job. Funny thing about Christians is that because the bible tells them that God looks down on the following items a), b), and c) (etc) that gives them permission to look down on the following items a), b) and c)(etc). They're judging.... and that's not their job, it's God's job... but they think it's their job.
As per your relationship with the Lord and your girlfriend. I think it's super cute. I completely understand what difficulties you are facing, my little cousin is dating a muslim boy and my mom and her dad were livid. And when I asked why they were so upset, or what was so wrong with it, the only thing they could say to me was 'Can you imagine what raising a child in that environment would be like?' I don't think that answered my question... at all. I didn't ask again.
Now a days, our generation (Especially in developed countries) is a lot less distinctly 'spiritual' as our ancestors.... this condemnation from our religious community is difficult to relate to if you aren't of that same mindset. A lot more people my age that I know of are believing that the stories in the bible are less factual truths, and more ethical guidelines.
On the other hand, there could be compromises. And maybe if it's important to you to be a good follower, there is an opportunity for you to grow with her in your faiths. You never know.
No, the Bible is not as stained or fallible as this author presents. What struck me as most interesting is that he writes, "...God is often used by men as an excuse for sinful behavior" and yet he is using humanity (and its fallen state) as an excuse for what near all Christians call sinful behavior (or at least unwise) by knowingly creating an unequally yoked relationship that is headed towards marriage.
I feel like this is one of those posts that essentially says "I think the Bible isn't perfect and can't be trusted because I don't understand the parts I have questions about so I'm going to cling to what fits my desires and skirt rebukes by saying Christians shouldn't 'judge'" (which, isn't true according to scripture).
I'm glad he's in love, that he respects people of other religions, enters interracial/intercultural relationships, and all that, but to rest upon the notion that since God used men to write the scriptures then they ought to be taken with a grain of salt, or picked apart at the will of the individual, seems irresponsible, irreverent, and scripturally undereducated. He appears to place more emphasis on personally feeling/experience than scripture when it comes to know God's Word, according to his last bit of the post.
The Bible is not tainted. It is a collection of divinely inspired books from a time long, long ago, from lands far, far away.
The greatest folly that modern people commit when examining the Bible is to look at it through their own eyes, from their own life and and their own time.That is an act of pride which destroys any chance of learning what God is forever trying to teach us.
Regarding your girl friend. Don't worry about it. Her Muslim parents will not allow her to marry an infidel. When they find out that you aren't some nutty young girl fantasy they will insert hell into your relationship.
Pray for your girlfriend and her parents; depending upon how seriously they take their Muslim faith, things could be very trying for you. Yet I have little doubt that somehow, by the Holy Spirit working through your love for her and her love for you, she will come to know Christ, and that is the most important thing in the world. May God bless you with every grace you need in this work of His!
I noticed one question in here that I wanted to offer my thoughts on: "And later on in the Book of Exodus, why does God who is so offended by abortion nowadays showing no pity towards the innocent lives of the Egyptian first-born?"
Not to say that I have the definitive answer to this question but I have given it some thought; I hope you find my thoughts helpful. It seems to me that God had established a covenant with Abraham and all of his descendants--which included Moses and the Hebrew people enslaved by Egypt--and the basic terms of that covenant were "You will be my people, and I will be your God." No other people on the face of the earth were a part of that covenant, and so the enemies of God's people became His enemies as well, their friends His friends, those that showed the Hebrews kindness received His kindness in return and those who did them evil experienced how zealously He protects His children.
Calling this to mind, then, it should be no surprise that God, in order to save His people, would go to the extreme of calling back to Himself all the first-born of Egypt so that His people would finally be freed. And it is likely that many of those first-born were innocent, too; many babies, infants and children. But do not all these first-born ultimately belong to God? Imagine the joy of those souls when suddenly they awaken in His presence and realize that all the awful and strange gods of Egypt were false, and how beautiful is the face of the True God who loves them (what god of Egypt loved any human being as God loves us?)! And as for the suffering the people of Egypt endured in the wake of such a loss as their first-born, I think the greatest tragedy is that they did not take this sign in such a way that they came to believe in the God who promised such a thing would happen if they did not let His people go. He tried all manner of plagues before, signs and wonders and everything but it finally came down to one thing: let MY first-born children go, or you shall let go of yours.
So why now is this same God, who seems to think that even taking the life of a little baby back to Himself is not so reprehensible, so much against abortion and abortifacient contraceptives? We absolutely must not forget the Incarnation.
What we see in the Incarnation is the invisible God become visible; God has become a member of the human race. Therefore each and every human being--Christian, Muslim, atheist, etc.--has their very BEING in common with God, even though they are not God themselves. Jesus Christ, at the moment of His conception in the womb of Mary, was a microscopic, single cell just as we all were at one point. Later Jesus would grow through the many stages of fetal development, just like the rest of us, and then would be born like the rest of us. Take what we know about Plan B, the Pill, IUDs, and the other methods of preventing implantation in the uterus and what's more take what we know without a doubt about abortion at any stage of pregnancy. What would have ended the nascent life of Christ in the womb ends ours as well, and vice-versa.
The Incarnation, you see, is a covenant between God and the whole human race. (read that a few times and really let it sink into your heart)
In the Old Testament we read about a God who makes a covenant with one small part of humanity, a sign of what was to come. The Incarnation is a covenant with the whole human race and while not all people make the choice or have the opportunity to participate fully in that covenant by entering into full communion with His Mystical Body, the Church, simply by being human you are in covenant with God through Jesus Christ because as we were created in His image He has deigned to dwell with us in our image; He has become one of us, and thus we are one of Him. Now the zealous protection which He once showed only to Israel is extended to all humanity; notice Jesus never said "love you fellow Christian as you love yourself" but "love your neighbor." Likewise He didn't say, "Whatever you do to the least of your fellow Christians you do to me" but simply "whatever you do to one of these least ones," and these least ones--the poor, sick, naked, imprisoned, etc.--exist throughout all mankind.
So what does it say to God when we abort--at any stage of development, even consciously and willfully preventing implantation (since sometimes implantation naturally does not occur, by no one's fault)--a human being? What does it say to Christ when we destroy the absolute very least of his people? I hope these thoughts of mine help to answer your question as to how the God who took the first-born of Egypt could nowadays hate abortion with a passion.
When He sees a newly conceived human life, He sees His Son.
While I think that starting out your life (as an adult, married person) would be a whole lot easier with someone of like beliefs...this is not always how it is.
My husband was raised in a Jehovah's Witness household. We had VERY differing views on Jesus and who He was and Is but that did not keep us apart. Instead, I prayed. He began attending church with me and eventually the truth entered his heart. It was a slow process as he was very indoctrinated with the 'truths' his family lived by.
Not once did any of my Christian brothers and sisters judge or condemn our relationship. Instead, they prayed and offered words of wisdom and counsel. I am grateful to them for that
@sometimestheycomebackanyway@xanga - "Muslims are like ordinary Christians". Care to elaborate on what you mean by that?
@TigersLovePepper@xanga - Thanks. I had a typo.
Since Muslims aren't like ordinary Christians, there will be blood, so to speak. All hell will break loose before a Muslim father will let his Muslim daughter marry an infidel.
The quran teaches about slaying the infidel and there is also a thing called honor killing so if they found out about her they would kill her. look it up on the internet. I would get out of the relationship as fast as possible. As god wants the best.
Dom
Alright, I'm going to comment on this.
Secular Muslim means non practicing. Neither of these people are "serious" about their faiths. Therefore, there is no schism, except at their core beliefs. I'm a christian just as much as the author is a christian. The bible, which gave me so much hope before, is now nothing but a cryptic and seemingly endlessly violent collaboration about God by 40 men who didn't know any better. Jesus? awesome. But I can barely see where he fits. Yes, I do believe people were so depraved in those days(watch apocolyptco, no God in them whatsoever) but now I get condemned by my church and it's like, why? My girlfriend has two children with different father, neither of whom she ever married. I've been to prison and was addicted to drugs. In the time of need, human responses are less than worthy.
Yet, I feel completely blessed by God.Those children are wonderful, and I could not ask for a better partner. I am very sure I can pray in the spirit at any time, and yet would you still judge me based on my supposedly erroneous belief in the bible? I hate to say it, but no matter how much I pray about it or read it, it just seems like a bunch of crap aside from maybe genesis, job, and the four epistles.
I used this young man's story as a sermon illustration. You can click on the link below and read what I had to say about it.
http://www.mightyfortress.us/index.php?p=1_464_18-March-2012
@scenefaith@xanga - The writer says, "When we went to visit her family in Astana during the Muslim holy month
of Ramadan, I also attended services with her parents. I fasted with
them from sunrise to sunset..." That doesn't sound "non-practicing" to me! If he thinks that they're not practicing, he should ask them to "please pass the bacon" next time he visits.
the difference between christianity and islam is the fact that christians believe that jesus is the son of god. islam allows relationship with people who have different faiths. i've heard my friends say that a muslim man is allowed to marry a christian girl but im not sure about the other way round. reading some of the comments you received, it hurts to hear someone say 'there will be blood'. if you want the truth about islam, read the quran, not the internet. and terrorism just made it worsen the opinions of people who doesnt even have the basic knowledge of the religion in the first place. if you talk to a practicing muslim, you will see the kindness and empathy that they have in them. i'm sure your girlfriend is also as loving and kind.
although i have a different religion than you, i agree ''It is the duty of every good Christian, in my opinion, to try to
separate the true shining light of God's Word from the dirt smears of
man's sinful nature cleverly masquerading as the Word of God.'' that is one of the most beautiful thing i've read. we all shouldn't cloud our judgement on any religion with the words of man.
i sincerely wish you the best on your relationship, may god give you a way in keeping your relationship til marriage. i've had friends, muslims,christians, buddhist who are still keeping their relationship together after years. by god's will, you will find a way :)
You have great insight into how scripture has been used and abused, and I hope you have a wonderful relationship with this girl. She sounds adorable.
@ToastersNMilkshakes@xanga - @RobertLeeRE@xanga - I wanted to respond to your idea that the Bible is not open to individual interpretion. The only thing you have to do to see how easily the word of God is changed by interpretation is to look at a couple different Bibles side by side: maybe a Catholic bible, a Korean Christian bible, a Baptist Bible, and a Georgian Orthodox bible. The words and their meanings are often completely different. So based on where you are born and what language you speak, you are already *interpreting* the bible a certain way.
Secondly, you probably learned your Bible from someone, a parent or pastor for instance. What this person believed about the Bible also shaped which parts of it are most important to you, and how you see God's word. What you believe today depends on how that person chose to view the Bible. And unless you refuse to wear mixed fabrics, sacrifice animals, and throw rocks at divorced women, I imagine whoever taught you the Bible was also *selective* about which passages are most important. Saying that **anyone can interpret the Bible** may seem irresponsible, but it is nowhere near as irresponsible as saying **there is only one interpretation of the Bible, and it just happens to the one I was born with. What a coincidence!** The original split between Catholics and Protestants was a result of this exact argument: people wanted the right to read and interpret the Bible for themselves, instead of via the priests of the corrupt medieval catholic church.
You really have the following points:
1. I want to do what I want to do so that I can bed my muslim girlfriend.
2. The New Testament is inconvenient to my plan to bed my muslim girlfriend.
3. Therefore, I need a supporting attack on the New Testament so that it is no longer relevant and won't obstruct my plan to bed my muslim girlfriend.
4. Therefore, my supporting attack is that the New Testament has been mistranslated and we can't really understand the parts that are inconvenient to me. This leaves me the option of believing whatever I want.
How do you know that the New Testament was originally written in aramaic and hebrew? I thought that I Corinthians, which talks about Christians not being unequally yoked with non-Christians, was written in greek.
So, if the New Testament was written in greek--not in hebrew and aramaic--then you are really clueless about New Testament transmission and the whole translation issue. As I have translated one NT book from greek to english, I'm very much aware of translation difficulties and that you have way overstated the difficulty of translation issues.
So, why not just give up your Christianity so that you can bed your muslim girlfriend and forget about Christ? You have essentially done that already anyway.
"I know that the Bible is the Word of God -- but it is the Word of God spoken through the mouths of men. The Bible has been translated from Aramaic to Hebrew to English throughout the millennia. The Word of God has been filtered through the minds and pens of countless scholars."
This. You realize that you can't dissect the Bible word for word, taking everything completely literally because it has been tainted by man through edits and misleading translations. You need to read it carefully, sure, but it's more about getting the big picture and overall message Jesus was trying to convey.
I'm also not sure why God would frown upon a marriage of two individuals who both worship him, just in different ways. If you were dating a Buddhist or Hindu or Pagan, okay. But Jews, Christians, and Muslim all worship the same god, it just comes down to different prophets. And then on top of that within each religion, there are all different sects and a belief that sects within a faith shouldn't intermarry.
This is an outside perspective, from someone who is pagan. I could completely understand why a Christian wouldn't want to date or marry me, yet I feel it would be less taboo.
I love how even here, people who "claim" to be christian are judging you. Even when they say I am not judging they still judge. I think what you are doing is both brave and beautiful and do not let anyone else tell you otherwise. If you are happy and she is happy and her family is consenting then that is all that matters.
@PastorDan - You know what I hate about this.
1. You did not obtain permission to quote him and you have not even shown where you got this from and thus you are copyright infringing and breaking the law. That's a wonderful thing for a pastor to do. As an artist nothing irritates me more than to see my work used by others without express written permission. If I was him I would make you take it down, but I am not.
2. You are judging him and making it seem fine by wrapping it up in a sermon. That is also an awful thing for any religious person, let alone a pastor to do. I know you are using this as an example, but this seems very underhanded for a pastor, a man of faith and cloth to do this. It would be one thing if you were ministering to this man one on one, but for you to spread his heartfelt love and turn it into something else, to me is disrespectful.
You may mean well, but I think you may be forgetting the biggest thing. They are in love. They are hurting no one, and they are happy beyond belief. Why must anyone trample on this. I am not religious and I refuse to buy into the crap of God's will or Jesus this or that. They are IN LOVE! Love is the only religion I will ever consent to follow. It is all that matters in the end. Show him some respect.
Our faith in Christ makes life difficult doesn't it. I think faith is always a struggle - how do you justify that God is using a prostitute who is still in the field but actively shares the love of God with other prostitutes? How do you justify an abortion when the baby was conceived as the father was in his final moments of life in battle with cancer, and the mother already has a 13 year old handicapped child and the fetus has been tested positive for Down's? And in your case, (and mine), how do we obey God when the ones we love aren't active followers of Christ?
I think we need to remember that we're not the ones to judge but we do have a responsibility to seek after God through the Bible and prayer and to follow His commands to the best of our abilities. Who can argue with you if you truly believe and feel that God affirms that He brought this girl into your life? I encourage you to study the Bible and the Quran together and discover where the two religions broke off (Ishmael and Isaac). I think it'll help you grow together and grow stronger in your faith and hopefully give you more confirmation of where you relationship should go.
Wow. There could not be two religions more at odds with each other than Christianity and Islam. Christianity says Jesus was God (trinitarian point of view)/the son of God (unitarians, I suppose). Islam says Jesus was not a god and that God has no sons (The quran doesn't really accurately represent what Christians believed). Christianity says Jesus was crucified. Islam says he wasn't. I'm pretty sure Christianity says there will be no other prophets after Jesus, and Islam says--surprise!--Muhammad is the last and final prophet. Muhammad thought he was giving teachings there were consistent with what was in the bible, but he wasn't. The idea that Christians and Muslims worship the same god is totally ridiculous. At best, you're both not very serious about your faiths and you might eventually have a very nominally religious family that gets along well. At worst, you're going to eventually have children who will have to pick between one of two totally contradictory religions that they won't even know are contradictory for some time. If or when they do learn about the contradictions though, there will probably be trouble. Unless no one in your family ends up taking their religion very seriously at all, family get-togethers should be a total blast. I wish you well.
@DraigStudio@xanga - The bible TELLS us to judge one another. IF he (the OP) is truly a Christian, then he'd KNOW that (as would you). The bible says to judge with righteous judgment, it also talks about correcting and how to do so.
This whole "don't judge me thing" ? It's a new concept for people who don't like to be told that what they're doing is WRONG...
ACTUALLY no one is really judging the OP here. They're telling him what the bible is, says, and what he should do based on those things. NONE of that is judgment ma'dear. It's actually supposed to be done in love and care for the person we are addressing. If your friend was about to do drugs, would you tell them not to do it? Yes? According to what you're saying, if you sat him/her down and told him not to do hardcore drugs and here are a list of reasons WHY you'd be JUDGING him... in a way, you are, but it's out of care and love for what you believe/know.
"Judgment" would be telling the OP, "You will be going to hell for doing these things." when in reality, none of us know the OP or his GF's fate, that's only for God to "judge" ... Correcting and the kind of judgment the bible encourages us to do is spoken of in the bible.
Don't believe me? Look it up.
Have a problem with it? Take it up with God.
As for OTHERS on here who are saying that the bible has "fallacies" or "Contradictions" ? No... it doesn't.
The reality here is that most of the things that LOOK that way can be explained by deep study of the bible and understanding of things outside of it as well (the history, the people it was addressed to at the time, etc)
I was an atheist/agnostic at one point, and I had questions about the bible myself. I will tell you that when you take them to a biblical scholar who knows such things, MOST of them (if not all) can be explained through knowledge of the bible and deep study.
Someone said, "You can't take the bible appart word for word" ... actually, yes you can. And this is what Jewish rabbis, and Christian scholars do.
OP- it's good that you are asking question, it means you're seeking truth. But be advised in THIS situation, you WILL be told things that you won't like, and YES if they're biblical, they are true.
Now, I married a man who was a former atheist who was VERY secular... but I felt that God had a plan there. Ultimately, no one can tell you what God's plan is except God, but they CAN tell you what the bible says and tell you the drama and horror that MIGHT occur (And likely will) in a relationship like this.