The other morning we got half-way to school and I noticed that #4's hair looked like a bird's nest. So if his hair was undone I figured other things were, too. I soon found out he didn't brush his teeth, either. I didn't check to see if he was wearing socks because I didn't even want to know.
Those what-kind-of-mother-am-I thoughts hit me hard during moments such as these, thoughts like how I've not taught my children great organizational skills. How I've not modeled wise time management. How I fear they'll grow up to freak out the in the same ways I do.
I worry when they grow up their houses will look like their rooms. And smell like their rooms. I cringe thinking their socks might be pink for the rest of their lives. And how when they think back to Sunday dinners they might only remember bowls of cereal.
But later in the day I read a prayer a mother prayed over her children and one line moved me to tears. May they be Your disciples.
And I realized then that this is all I really want for my kids. May they be His disciples. Even if I do fall short as their mother, what does it matter because all I really want is for them to know Jesus and to follow Him all the days of their lives.
And by the grace of God they will, in spite of an imperfect upbringing filled with pink socks, bird-nest hair, and cereal for supper. Lord, may they all grow up to follow You.
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Comments (3)
I'm sorry I don't want to be rude but don't you think is a lil irresponsable to burden your creator with the education and care of your kids? Isn't that supposed to be your work as a mom? So your point is doesn't matter if they grew up to be sloppy inadapted resented adults if they believe in God? I think this is my problem with some religious people, they think they can just ignore every responsability in life just because they believe in God and that automatically make you a wonderful person.
this reminds me of something that happened a bit ago. my sister told me that she and my three-year-old niece were at my cousin's house. my cousin's family has some play equipment in their back yard, and my niece said she wanted to go to the "park." my sister wasn't sure what she was talking about until she realized she meant the play equipment in the back yard. my sister was initially upset, feeling like my niece's thinking that was a park was more reflective on their financial troubles, since they live in an apartment and don't have all of the things other families have. i told her it was probably just because my niece is young and doesn't know the difference in english between play equipment in someone's yard and an actual park with a playground. ultimately, she's three years old. she can barely say the words she actually knows properly.
all of the physical trappings of child-training, things like rooms and grooming and that, they're all gonna be rough early on. (especially with four kids!) i'm twenty-five years old and i still have trouble keeping my room clean. my brother is the same way, and my sister has her own issues. just the same, though, even though parts of our lives are messy, my parents still gave us the tools to be intelligent, passionate adults, and each of us is doing work we find important. i moved to south korea right after college to teach english and am now going through my peace corps application process. my brother is a successful nurse and is looking to move to chicago very soon, and my sister is, if not the director, one of the higher-ups of the daycare she works at.
all of that to say that if his worst problem is that he doesn't comb his hair or brush his teeth all the time, i'm sure it'll be okay. grooming is important, and i'm sure that'll come with time.
Being distracted once in a while doesn't mean you're falling short as a mom. Your house can be perfectly clean all the time, your children perfectly groomed, you can spend hours in church worshipping, and still your kids might have a horrible childhood or grow up to be horrible people. The important thing is helping them to build great memories and teaching them to be responsible, educated people. Yes, you were distracted and didn't get his teeth brushed or hair combed. But that's okay, you'll try again tomorrow. That's teaching your kids that it's okay if you make a mistake or are a little forgetful, but you can always fix it and try again tomorrow. It DOES matter if you fall short in your mothering (and here I'm talking major issues, not forgetting to brush teeth). I know you want your children to know God, but if you tell them that's the only important thing in their lives, they aren't going to know HOW to live a life for God or be able to share it with other people. There has to be a balance between earthly and spiritual living. But I'm sure you already know that, because you are a good mother.