It's a dry, thirsty land full of danger and way more valleys than mountaintops. It's a hopeless place of entrapment, and when I was there I thought I'd never get out. At times I fear I'll end up in Egypt again, but not in a physical sense. My Egypt is in my memories.
It's an easy place to return to--a downhill trip all the way. Some days I struggle to stay planted where I am now, always haunted by this slippery slope where at the bottom waits that old familiar pit of bondage and despair. No way do I want to go back there.
It's hard sometimes, accepting His grace. It's hard realizing He's made me new. I really am free of those detestable chains that had me bound for so long. The enemy wants to keep the truth of that grace from sinking into my heart. Oftentimes the world does, too. And so the deceptive whispers persist, always taunting me ... It wasn't so hard back then, was it? So few battles to fight, don't you remember? Wasn't the old life easier?
Then I consider it. I remember how little determination it took to let my flesh rule. I recall what it was like bearing a much lighter burden of responsibility. I ponder how oblivious I used to be to the wicked one's vicious schemes. How he left me alone back then since I wasn't a threat to him. How it must've pleased him, what little time I spent living for Jesus.
So the devil was pleased, the Lord was heartbroken, and I was miserable. No, the old life wasn't easier. So no matter how weary I grow and no matter how easy it might seem to let go just for awhile, I won't do it. Instead I'll hold fast to the Rock of Ages, the One who stands firmly planted here in the Promised Land.
And a bountiful land it is, full of beauty and blessing where flows an abundance of Living Water. This is my true
homeland, and I'll keep on clinging and dwell here forever and never be thirsty again.
Instead of their shame My people will receive a double portion, and instead of disgrace they will rejoice in their inheritance; and so they will inherit a double portion in their land, and everlasting joy will be theirs. Isaiah 61:7