Thursday, 12 May 2011
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Arguing With Atheists: Respect and Letting Go
I used to waste countless hours of my life arguing with atheists (and others) who didn't agree with what I had to say about Christianity. It turned out that all along, I was more in love with being right than I was in love with God and others. When I came to that realization, I began to listen to what others had to say. I eventually got the hang of treating others the way I'd like to be treated and actually started acting out of love, rather than fear.
To me, it seems safe to assume that that is the reason we tend to go on the defense and bicker rather than have a nice mellow discussion: fear. The idea that atheists have opinions that differ from Christians drives many Christians insane. Of course, I can't pick on the Christians alone, because many atheists (of new atheism in particular) fear that religion is a terrible thing for our world because it promotes ignorance, encourages delusion, causes war, and discourages human progress. Something I, being a Christian, definitely don't agree with.
Religious differences aside, I believe it's possible for all parties to get along. Many atheists have told me that they respect me and my opinions. And this is not to boast. To some Christians, it's because I give a little too much credit to atheism, I don't shove their sin in their face, and I don't stick up for God when He's being put down. That's not the way I see it, though. I believe that God is revealed through others. God chose those who believe in Christ to show the world that Jesus is still alive, and that the proof is living in us. Some will see it, but some won't see it. When there are those that won't see it though, we have two options.
- Be patient
- Fight
I feel like too many people choose to fight rather than be patient and let the Word of God speak for Himself. Eventually, He will- even if some are deaf to it.
One thing I feel like we have to remember is that it's one thing to answer a question. It's a completely different thing to be quick to tear down the views of others that they've spent so much time and effort building up to begin with. This is why everyone tends to go on the defense.
I'm reminded of the story told in Luke 9 when Jesus sent his disciples out to minister in pairs. He told them that if someone welcomes them, then to stay in their house. If the town does not welcome them, then they were to dust off their feet and move on. I think we can learn from that. There will always be ones who are willing to receive the Word God has sent us to teach. Others, on the other hand, will not receive it, no matter what you do. We can't force people to believe, even if what we believe in has totally changed us, reshaped us, and currently motivates us. Arguing will not get us anywhere. In fact, it distances us from each other. A good work is being done when an atheist accepts a Christian. It's reversed when a Christian attacks an atheist's position. These matters could and should be handled in love and understanding.
Christians love seeing others come to Christ. However, it is important to see that atheism offers Christianity something that nothing else can: evidence that God loves us. He allows us to have the option to follow and obey Him, or turn our backs on Him. This is true freedom. Freedom shows God's love.
One last thing. How we react will show what we reflect. When talking with others, are we revealing the kingdom of God, or are we serving ourselves and our own selfishness? This is a good question to meditate on.
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Comments (7)
Very Good Points The Whole Way Through.
Both Sides could learn a lot from this post if they will only read it
and not try to interpret it.
My experience says what you will more than likely get though is a
bunch of religious Christians throwing Bible verses at you on why you are
wrong and a bunch of Atheist complaining about your belief in an invisable ferry.
Too bad both sides (Myself included) cant just do as you said and RESPECT each
others ideals.
Oh Well; Great Post
Great insights.
Yesterday I learned about a new perspective for humility: "non-competitiveness; and confidence without egotism."
I think it's spot-on, and a great remedy for the "will to debate (compete)" for one's views to be heard above all others (competition)...
A lot of the fierce debaters have such a strong will to win but their ability to truly listen to the other party appears to be underdeveloped.
It's funny sometimes, but it doesn't really lead anywhere. Nobody changes anything, nobody learns anything new.
When talking with others, are we revealing the kingdom of God, or are we serving ourselves and our own selfishness?
I must say, I love this post...it is much needed. To answer your question I would love to say I am revealing the kingdom of God but when I don't speak when God tells me to speak I am serving myself and my own selfishness. But when I do speak with others about God/the gospel I believe that I am revealing the kingdom of God. I do not believe in and I am strongly against arguing with unbelievers. It is profitless. It's foolishness. The Word says in 2 Timothy 2:23 "But avoid foolish and ignorant disputes, knowing that they generate strife. And a servant of the Lord must not quarrel but be gentle to all, able to teach, patient, in humility correcting those who are in opposition." Also in James 1:20-21 "So then my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath, for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God."I've stopped arguing with Christians a long time ago. I'd rather just say good luck in life and move on with my own life.
Superb post with great wisdom! Declaring the Truth lovingly must ALWAYS BE followed by a loving response to every reaction! (Sometimes the most loving response is to simply turn and walk away from the argument.) And this holds true with every hearer -- atheist, agnostic, one professing another faith and even the professing Christian of a different faith tradition!
So-called Christians who argue loudly over doctrinal issues demonstrate a very weak relationship with Christ to the whole world. Alas, I too have been guilty of this, my dying ungodliness too often arising to get into the way of my Message, Christ Alive, Living In Me.
I think the problem is that most atheists don't want to let go. Or possibly, they don't want you to let go.
So true. I could agrue till my face turns blue. And I admit that I have. It wouldn't make a bit of difference. As a Christian, who am I helping (people in real need) if I argue and argue and argue?
Atheists and Christians say cruel things when provoked. It is the ugliness of human nature. Who fights the fiercest and the most unfair? Atheists will say Christians and Christians will say atheists.
Will we all sit in front of our computers day after day, hour after hour, and reply to the countless attacks that both sides are doing? Youtube and Twitter and countless other sites will continue into one debate and attack after another. Is that right or healthy for anyone? Surely, not!
You have the likes of Bill Maher constantly (and dare I say "obsessively") is stirring the pot to poke fun at Christans. He knows very well if he keeps it up, enough Christians will be so infuriated that they will give him a piece of their mind, only to fuel his shrewd and self-serving desire to show everyone (who thinks he has "right" on his side) what a joke Christians really are. In other words, he loves to trip Christians up in fighting back.
Then you have the Westboro Baptist Church of Kansas, who I will never accept as Christians, with the audacity and obsession to protest and picket such things as funerals, constantly giving Christianity a huge blemish, a "black eye" and a bad name all in their own (with no help from any atheist) by saying how "G*d hates f*gs" and other vile things.
Both sides can be worthy of shame, no doubt. I am in full agreement.
A favorite of atheists: hypocrites, foolish, arrogant, ignorant, illogical, lack of brains, stupid, retarded, moron, superstitous, weaklings, hateful.....and all that is wrong with the world. Often, any swear word imaginable are used to really stick it to Christians.
A favorite of Christians: You will burn in Hell! I hope you burn in Hell! We can surely resort to swearing (I may be a Christian, but I once was an atheist/ agnostic in my teens, and I can swear like a sailor if I wanted to), AND I HAVE (admitting my weaknesses if put to the test). We also can throw out Bible verses in a way to insist we are right, often in a condemning way.