Saturday, 03 July 2010
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Singleness According to Eve
By
Sharon at SheWorshipsI will be out of the country just a few more days, and during this time I’ve really enjoyed revisiting some of my older posts, especially from my days as a single gal. Below is a post I wrote to challenge myself in my season of singleness, but I honestly find it to be just as great a challenge today. Regardless of where you are in life, we can all learn from the triumphs and mistakes of Eve.
Eve is a unique character in the Bible. She is unique in that she is frequently referenced as a prototype for ALL women. The rest of the women in the Bible are used to highlight certain attributes of women (with the exception of the Proverbs 31 woman, perhaps), but Eve embodies them all. She is the source of all womanhood, so Scripture and Church tradition alike have looked to her as a model for what women should, and should not, do. For this reason, Christian women throughout the Church’s history have looked at Eve for direction and identity. She was the first woman, and is therefore the definitive woman.
With all of that in mind, I was deeply dismayed when I came to a startling realization: Eve was never single. Eve was the prototype for all women who followed her, yet her life was defined by only two key phases: marriage and motherhood. She was created into marriage, therefore by-passing singleness, so the only way we ever really talk about Eve is in relation to Adam. In fact, her first sin was in being independent from Adam.
So if Eve is the definitive woman, and her entire life is articulated in light of her relationship to Adam, how are we single gals to relate? Does this mean we are only fully women once we get married and start having babies? Surely that can’t be true since God does not ordain that all women get married. That being said, what does Eve’s life have to say about singleness? How are we to understand Eve’s life in a way that embodies ALL women, no matter their stage in life?
The answer to this question can be found by shifting the way in which we look at Eve’s life. Instead of dividing her life into the two stages of marriage and motherhood, we must divide her life between the stages of obedience and disobedience, faithfulness and unfaithfulness, Paradise and Fallenness. There was the period of time in which she lived in perfect bliss with Adam, and the time in which she lived in sin outside the Garden. It is these two stages, rather than marriage and motherhood, that are the most important stages in Eve’s life, and the two stages that we women need to note.
Why is such a shift in perspective necesssary? Because communion with God will always and forever be more important than marriage and motherhood. Marriage and motherhood are gifts, as well as a means for serving God, but they do not make us who we are. God alone determines that. Our identity as women comes first and foremost from our relationship with God, not a husband or any other man, and that is the bridge with which all women can connect with Eve.
With that in mind, Eve is the definitive woman in that her life illustrates two types of womanhood: a woman in pursuit of God, or a woman in disobedience to God. In the Garden of Eden, Eve’s happiness was primarily connected to her relationship with God. After the Fall, her unhappiness was a direct result of her alienation from God. In a sense, Adam’s presence was merely circumstantial. Yes, the way in which she related to Adam was a way of honoring God, but ultimately it was all about God, Adam or not.
This, then, is what women are to learn from Eve: No matter where you are in life, single, or married, your primary concern is God. Ultimately, nothing else defines you as a woman except your discipleship. You are the fullest embodiment of a woman when you are submitting yourself to God in all that you do. You will also be most content when you are obedient to Him. We see what this kind of womanhood looks like in the Garden, and we see what fallen womanhood looks like after the Garden. And in addition to that, we are reminded that there is a danger in defining yourself any other way. If you think Christ-centered womanhood only comes with marriage and motherhood, then you commit the same sin as Eve: finding your identity in something other than God.
Thus Eve’s life is a reminder to us all, regardless of where we are in life. It is comforting for us singles, reassuring us that we are just as much women as anyone else, but it is also a form of accountability for wives and mothers, for whom it is easy to get swept up in the commitments of those roles. Neither singleness, marriage or motherhood make us women. God alone can make us into the women He created us to be, so it is a waste to seek for our identities in anything else.
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Comments (8)
It's interesting, because I've never really related much to Eve; whenever someone says, "well, Eve never did --" my thought is "she's also the mother of sin, you think I want to be compared to her?!"
Jael and Deborah are my favorite biblical rolemodels..
@Ktothetin@xanga - mother of sin... in some sense... but Adam was responsible for the Fall, not even mainly because God held him responsible, remember, God called Adam first, and only approached Eve after Adam played the blameshifting game
as far as the post itself... there is a way to look at this from a single girls POV... that I am not... but I think Scripture has a lot of time gaps... for instance, between the Woman's creation and God bringing her to Adam... that space in between...
I would think it would be safe to say that in that undocumented gap between creation and marriage... a single girl could look at that period as the means by which God's hand was on her life and brought her up (creation itself could be looked at as that period of singlehood) and then when the circumstances were right (namely, the man having a job and being totally clueless of events but aware of HIS singlehood and aloneness) Eve was brought to Adam...
and just something funny to think about... there is no record of Adam having woken up from his coma... and that speaks of dudes today... lol...
Great perspective! I've been having trouble finding myself, but this kind of smacks me in the face a little.
Thank you for posting this!
How do one person know if god meant for her to be single? My Sunday School teacher had told me that god made everyone the to be in pairs. As Eve is created from one of Adam's bones. We are part of someone out there but just he haven't find the bone yet. Then why there are single people out there? She said that is because people had gone to search for the bone themself without following what God wants, so that the bone is misplace and mismatched. If god wants me to be single then I really wish he just let me give up the thoughts of having someone. Try to let go of that feeling but then I still wish I have someone and get marry. I try to accept and focus more on work and my self.
This is a great perspective! I'm not a single lady myself, but I am an independent one!
I agree with inspireyourdreams. thanks.