Sunday, 11 April 2010
I look back at myself now that I am single, in my early 30s, without a permanent job and still stuck living with my parents. What went wrong? As I looked back at all the things I had done in my 20s, it was nothing but studying and working.
I had two relationships in my 20s that ended miserably, as both were cheaters. I don't know how I end up with them, I guess I wasn't looking carefully. The second relationship lasted six-and-a-half years, with us thinking we would be married by now and with kids, but only to realize he used me and played me for the longest time. Especially what I had done for him, that cheap jerk!
Anyhow, I have never stopped going to school and working in my life. I took summer school each year and only one year in my life I took a summer off because there is no summer school by the end of grade 13. If there were summer school, I think I would have gone.
I worked two jobs while I went to university. When I came back from college, I worked three jobs and taught full-time at school. Moreover, I took additional qualification courses and attended professional development conferences. Still, I made time to see that jerk, while he always complained he had no time to even call me.
All the hard work gave me the highest level in salary but I don't have a permanent job to really use it. I don't know if I will have a job by September. I can't own anything because my job is unstable. The houses are so expensive right now, ownership requires two incomes, and I don't know how to get a down payment.
The good thing I did was traveling in my late 20s. I went back to Hong Kong every other 2 years, went on my first cruise with my family, traveled to Japan (which was one of my childhood dreams) and accomplished what I wanted do be in life. It's a good thing in some ways.
I want to ask God why he wants me to be this way. Why do bad things just happens to good people?
As you look back, do you think you have had a good life so far?