Saturday, 14 November 2009

• Trends I Don't Get: Letting Directors of Bad Movies Dictate Our Eschatology

  By Justin at Faith and Geekery
  
  You can stop panicking now. Put the sandbags away, drain the tub filled with bleach-purified water, and start eating those MREs you bought from a sketchy-looking online site. NASA’s on the case:

  The world won’t end in 2012, NASA argues
  2012 is cashing in on a gamut of wild doomsday scenarios revolving around the belief that the Mayan calender purportedly ends on December 21st, 2012. The date is thought to be significant to many besides, and there are even opposing theories swirling around claiming that the world won’t end, but instead shift radically.

  “NASA insisted the Mayan calendar in fact does not end on December 21, 2012, as another period begins immediately afterward. And it said there are no planetary alignments on the horizon for the next few decades.”

  All better? Good. NASA’s got it under control. Please tell me this answers all of the panic over the end of the world, and nothing more will come of this for the next 3 years.

  It won’t? Oh well, those of us who remember getting alarmist emails and forwards from friends about Y2K know what to expect.

  The article goes on to tell us that NASA has a whole web page to quell rumors that a new disaster movie made by the man who directed Godzilla is somehow prophetic. Look it up.

  My understanding is that the original mock-up of the website was much more direct.
  

  To be fair, this isn’t the first movie about the end of the world, and it’s hardly the first time people have used the end of the world to push movies or books. The end of most or all of humanity is a concept that is both horrifying and fascinating to us. Science tells us it’ll likely happen sometime in the next 4.5 billion years, which is good for those who procrastinate.

  This isn’t even the first movie to cash-in on the 2012 hysteria. There was a movie out last year called 2012: Doomsday where the world more or less ended. It was made by the same people who gave us such memorable films as Snakes on a Train and the giant alien robot movie The Transmorphers. You can watch 2012: Doomsday here or instantly at Netflix, although making it past 10 minutes probably isn’t recommended. The new 2012 movie has a budget nearing a quarter billion; the other one may have been a quarter and whatever other change was under the mattress.

  Yes, that’s right…2012’s budget is rumored to be about $200 million. That’s pretty impressive considering the subject matter renders the movie antiquated in less than 3.5 years.

  Each decade has had its own look at the end of the world, or at least the breakdown of society. The 60s saw Cold War movies like Dr. Strangelove and Fail Safe. The 70s had a number of apocalyptic movies from Christians, like Thief in the Night and its sequels. The 80s had the nuclear war movies like Testament and The Day After,with its British counterpart Threads. The 90s saw a flood of disaster movies like Independence Day, Twister, Volcano, and Outbreak. The new decade seems to have gone the supernatural route, where the end includes zombies and aliens.

  There was also a spate of Y2K movies ten years ago, and not a one of them sounded good. That didn’t stop the alarm bell: a much maligned television movie that aired on NBC was still supposed to raise preparedness awareness. I didn’t see the movie but I’m guessing it wasn’t simply ninety minutes of people resetting their VCRs to 1972 and making sure they didn’t accidentally upgrade to Windows ME.

  Anyway, speaking of people like NASA telling us that we shouldn’t worry about what will happen in the future, it’s a good thing that Jesus took care of that one already:

  “But of that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.  Take heed, watch and pray; for you do not know when the time is.” – Mark 13:32 NKJV
  

  That settles it, right? The Lord’s message of “do not worry” is a common theme throughout the four books of the gospels.  I mean, Jesus told us not to get into the panic of trying to figure out when the Lord will return, and he told us to ignore those who claim to have it mapped out. I feel like this is pretty clear cut, but somehow it keeps coming up.

  Those old enough might remember a few of the big “days” over the past few decades. A book called 88 Reasons Why the Rapture Will Be in 1988 sold over 4 million copies twenty-one years ago. Christian TV network TBN interrupted programming to give updates. The year passed and…nothing happened. The same author tried again in 1989 and 1993 with far fewer sales.

  In 1994, another major Christian broadcaster said we’d be seeing the end of the world. It didn’t happen, but that hasn’t kept their president from saying 2011 is the cut-off date. Others may remember Hal Lindsey’s The Late Great Planet Earth which didn’t set any dates, yet still helped us get in to the mode of expecting the worst very soon. It was made into a movie featuring narration by Orson Welles.

  For years I had a record from the early 70s by a pastor who said it was very likely that the Lord would return by 1977. The guy’s still out there, setting a flexible date every few years. Here’s a list of 30 other days where either Jesus was supposed to come back or the world was supposed to end. Some dates were set by laughable heretics, but others by people that might surprise you.

  Again, it never hurts to remember what Jesus said about this:

  “Then if anyone says to you, ‘Look, here is the Christ!’ or, ‘Look, He is there!’ do not believe it. For false christs and false prophets will rise and show signs and wonders to deceive, if possible, even the elect. But take heed; see, I have told you all things beforehand.” – Mark 13:21-23

  Why did he tell us beforehand? I don’t think it was so we could panic and set dates; he seemed to be rather opposed to both of these ideas. I think he told his disciples all of this because Jesus’ ministry on the Earth showed us a clearer picture of the Father: he is in control, and none of the calamities of this world are new or alarming to him. If it looks like the world is falling apart, it’s not our place to worry about what happens next; he’s already told us what we need to know. If his return is tomorrow or thousands of years from now, his grip on the world will be the same, and Jesus reminds us to never forget this.

  So let’s make sure we’re not getting into apocalypse mode too easily. Every few years a new theory comes out on how close we are to “The Rapture” (which is a whole other topic!), when Jesus will come back, who the anti-Christ really is (every president during my life has been called Anti-Christ…even Jimmy Carter), and who will be left to pick up the pieces. It passes us by, another theory comes through, and the cycle is repeated. I can’t see how dwelling on this can be healthy, and I don’t see how we could serve God by trying to figure out what he told us we couldn’t.

  On the other hand, if we didn’t have people throwing around dates there wouldn’t be a need for parodies like this. Please refrain from drinking for the first few minutes; if you don’t, I won’t be held responsible for any messes that ensue.

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