In the face of these stereotypes, we reveal the true spirit of what
we’re saying. We’re really no better than chauvinistic men who
stereotype women in insulting ways. We are female chauvinists.

Yes.Great post.

I know plenty of men who are dramatic. Drama is not an exclusively female attribute. Men can still be moody, condescending, or lash out in fear. Not because they’re less manly, but because they’re sinners. So now being a guy and having feelings or being dramatic is a sin? Not all condescention is negative. Sometimes chiding someone is a good way to motivate them. Jesus himself did that frequently. Being moody is simply embracing the emotions that God gave all of us. Happiness, sadness, frustration, there are not exclusively reserved emotions for one gender vs. the other. They may be more prominent in the masculine vs. the feminine, but they are there, nonetheless.

You have a whale of a double standard for women vs. men, and tomboys vs. "girly-girls".  My daughter loves pink, looks lovely in a dress, and is a sharpshooter, rides a motorcycle, and can kick your ass. Does this make her feminine, masculine, in touch with her feelings, chauvanistic? BS. Makes her human and herself.  When you try to paint the range of human emotions and activities with a Theological brush, you become discriminatory and sexist by default.

Your opening statement seems to be based on trying to befriend "funny" women, then relating that to finding guy friends. "Funny" women tend to be outgoing, self-confident, usualy have a positive attitude and a smile. The sense of humor can be developed any direction; sarcasm (used very selectively and carefully) dry wit, absurdity, situational, word play, etc.  Men tend to be naturally more outgoing and self confident, and a good many greet people with a firm handshake and a smile, something that tends to exude confidence. They also tend to mask their feelings and use their professional or at least public persona most of the time. Only when they become good friends with someone do they "open up", and that may be to only one or two people. When they get together for Monday night football, they do not sit around and discuss the jerk at work and how it makes them feel, etc. They escape it by focusing on the football. When men have a deep problem, they retreat into their mancave, work it out internally, then re-emerge, problem solved.  Women tend to want to "talk" through their feelings, problems, challenges, and commiserate with each other. Reaching a solution or answer is not necessary; the fulfilment comes in the talking, the relating, knowing that others feel the same way you do.

God created us male and female, and some seem to fall inbetween. He put feminine traits (to a lesser degree) in men, and masculine traits (to a lesser degree) in women. We can work on developing and enhancing any or all, but we are wired differently, and react differently to situations based on our masculinity or femininity. This is God designed, not a confusing thing we need to sort out.

One thing I will say, women tend to be far more critical and judgemental in their assessments of other women than men do. In guy groups, physical size and strength, appearance, really have little to do with their interpersonal relationships. Bob can be 300 lbs and fat as a hog, and no one brings it up or makes fun of him for it unless something funny occurs as a result (like crushing a lawnchair) But the same cannot be said for women. Get a group that has one or two beautiful women, and the others are catty and judgemental of her. They rationalize they are not as pretty, successful, outgoing, whatever, and tend to attack. Or a group that has slender pretty girls and one or two overweight or unattractive girls, the pretty ones snicker and gossip behind the less fortunate one's backs. Not unusual for a group of two or three to include one less attractive; makes the others look better by comparison.

Part of it depends on the age and settings where the people gather. A group of guys college age vs. a group of guys in their 40's at bowling league or cooking dinner for Wednesday night youth group will have a dramatically different makeup, yet still form the same camaraderie and team spirit. Can't say the same for women. Life is kind to the pretty girls, their paths are easier. Seems naturally easier for them to be positive, outgoing, friendly, etc. Some overweight, or "Ugly Betty" type, some shy wallflower will have a real hard time fitting in except with like minded girls. They lose themselves in books or movies, fantasizing about romance and excitement, because the possibility of experiencing it IRL seems vastly out of reach. Or they eat for comfort, which only exacerbates the problem.

Your come from the position of being a beautiful woman, successful, educated, with a great husband and a bright future. You have already experienced success on levels that many will never know. While your intent in this post is to explore chauvanism male vs. female, and female tomboy vs. feminine, I guess I am not getting the Theological path you are traveling. We should all embrace one another fairly, humanely, and with brotherly love. That isn't a male or female thing, or chauvanistic or whatever, it's what Jesus told us to do. We each need to explore the feelings and emotions God gave us, work on our relationships with one another, to ensure we are behaving towards one another as God would want us to. Non-judgementally (admittedly harder for women to do) with gentleness, kindness, and forgiveness near the surface. The lust and sexuality thing is far harder for guys, especially with the plethora of skin and suggestiveness on the web. We can get extreme like the Islamists and make women cover themselves to help us keep from sinning (how chauvanistic is that?) Or we can deepend our relationship with God through daily prayer and walking with Jesus, asking His help in treating others as He would. For me, that is the right path.

it's really frustrating to me when people make sweeping generalizations like this about any group of people, whether it's a gender, an ethnicity, an age group, whatever. people are people.

I have read that book by Levy, and it was very interesting. I think it showed a true side of our society than many people like to forget, or ignore.

And while yes, we do tend to make sweeping generalizations, there is a reason for those generalizations. I've never had a guy cattily remark to me, "Wow, I could NEVER get away with that shirt! The church elders would totally get mad at me. Oh well, it's probably just me they don't like."

The girlfriends I've had have all bombed out on me, while the guy friends that I have are still loyally standing next to me after everything we've gone through together. I think it's normal to want to hang out with the opposite sex, as it's instinctual to want to be with the people you could see as possible mates. If that venue doesn't work out, there is no reason you cannot be friends, and usually, you tend to be more loyal to those you first viewed as love interests. Even if that view never went beyond the subconscious, it works, and it's good.

Anyways, I'm not sure I really understood the point of this post.