Wednesday, 11 November 2009
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Helpful Questions When Dealing With Depression
By Clayton KingNot long ago, I received an email from a brother in Christ who was really going through a dark valley of discouragement and depression. He asked for my advice. I really believe the Holy Spirit inspired me to respond to him with a list of questions. I want to provide these for you today in hopes that in reading and responding to them, you will be forced to dig deeper into your heart, beyond the tough days and feelings of loneliness, and find some answers as to why you feel like you do sometimes, and what you can do by God’s grace to turn things around.
Here is what I shared with this dear brother, and I share it with you in hopes that you are served and blessed through it.
Take an inventory of your life by asking the following questions:
- Do I get enough rest?
- What time do I go to bed? How late do I sleep?
- Do I eat healthy food or junk?
- Do I rely on caffeine or sugar or energy drinks for energy?
- Do I have any unhealthy relationships I need to get out of?
- Am I bitter or resentful about anything in my past?
- Am I allowing someone else’s expectations of me to discourage me?
- Is there a secret sin or sins in my life that I am hiding from God or others?
- Am I looking at anything on the internet that is sinful or questionable?
- How much time do I spend online everyday?
- Am I withholding forgiveness from anyone?
- Does my life lack any daily structure or routine?
- Is my life, my desk, my car, or my room filled with clutter?
- How much TV do I watch, and what kind of shows do I entertain myself with?
- Am I worshipping Christ and singing and meditating in private?
- Is there a tough conversation I know I must have that I am avoiding?
- Is there a big decision I know I need to make that I am putting off?
Just asking these questions will start you down a road where, if you will follow up with honest answer, you can begin to understand what leads you into these dark valleys and what you can do in your every day life to avoid the feelings of depression or discouragement. There is always a place for solid, professional counseling. But in my experience, these are the questions a good counselor would ask you. I pray they are helpful.
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About the Author
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- From: claytonking
- Name: Clayton
- About Me: Born in 1972, Clayton was adopted at 3 weeks old and raised in a Christian home in Fountain Inn, SC by Joe and Jane King. He grew up in the country and learned the value of honesty, hard work, and keeping your word. His parents were Southern Baptist, he attended a Presbyterian Christian school, and his grandfather was Pentecostal. He had an interesting perspective on God and church from a very young age, as you can imagine! God saved him when he was 14 years old and the same night he was saved he felt God call him into the ministry. He surrendered to that call and has preached to almost 2 million people in 25 countries and 45 states. To see more about Clayton please go to: http://claytonking.com/about
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Comments (11)
You should make more clear what type of depression you are dealing with in this post. Bipolar disorder and other regular chemical based depressions will only be helped slightly by your questions. Otherwise, these questions would probably help, though they're very general and broad ranging questions. It ought to start him off.
How do 4, 9, and 15 fall into being depressed?
@CyanideNGunpowder@xanga - i have to agree with this. true depression is a mental illness that is horrible and painful to endure (i know first-hand). religion should be left out of it.
While I think these questions are helpful for people in a stable enough place to do some deep soul-searching and self-inventory (i.e. those who are discouraged), I think it communicates a misunderstanding about the nature of potentially clinical depression. Often, people suffering from a major depressive episode are either acutely aware of their "shortcomings" or are entirely apathetic to them. To that extent, a self-inventory like this may actually exacerbate their sense of hopelessness and helplessness.
That said, I think these are excellent questions for those who are discouraged or in a spiritual rut and thank you for posting them.
18. Do I have a chemical imbalance? Is brushing my teeth too complex? Do we know the difference between depression and loneliness and can we use the words correctly in a complete sentence?
If answering those 17 questions honestly and changing myself to fit those answers cured depression, I could have saved myself 8 years of medications, hospitalizations and thousands of dollars in counseling.
I figure the author was probably writing more so about sadness relating to loneliness, etc., and not clinical depression.
Either way, I'm in the beginning of a depressive episode and I'm not feeling too forgiving toward people who either accidentally use the word in the wrong way, or imply that clinical depression can be solved by tidying up your life.
I spent 4 1/2 years in a depression (probably not 'clinical' or 'chemical imbalance', etc). It was more of a spiritual situation in which I really needed to come to 'grips' with some realities---actually, it turned out to be a paradigm shift in my whole way of perceiving myself and thinking. I'm not sure I can say that I worked thru the issues & just finally emerged from 'the pit'-----It was more like, I was finally 'lifted' out of that darkness. Someone asked me why God permitted me [compelled me?] to stay in that condition for as long as I did and the only answer I could give, was that I needed it---I was there so I could learn---learn to embrace my mortality, learn a greater sense of appreciation of life and the One Who gives it, etc.etc.
I'm not sure where I got this, but to some degree, the thought resonates with me: 'Impression - [minus] Expression = Depression.' There are important things/realities in our lives that we know or perceive, that need to be expressed in healthy positive ways. When there is no outlet for that expression, depression is often the result.
"With the arrival of Jesus, the Messiah, that fateful dilemma [see Romans 7:20-25--'Something has gone wrong deep within me' ] is resolved. Those who enter into Christ's being-here-for-us no longer have to live under a continuous, low-lying black cloud. A new power is in operation." Romans 8:1-3 [MSG] LAW--
There are lots of damaged emotins in most of our lives. One of the most common is a deep sense of unworthiness, a continuous feeling of anxiety, inadequacy, and inferiority, and inner nagging that says, "I'm no good. I'll never amount ot anything. No one could ever possibly love me. Everything i do is wrong.
What happens to this kind of person, when they becomes a Christians? Part of there mind believes in od's love, accepts God's forgiveness, and feels a peace fro a while. Then, all of a sudden, everything within that person rises up to cry out. "It's a lie! Don't believe it! Don't pray! There's no one up there to hear you. No one realy cares. There's no one to relieve our anxiety. How could god possibly love me and forgive someone like me? "I'm too bad!
Does God have some repairs for us? Yes. Paul wrote to the Roman Christians about the Holy Spirit who helps our infirmities Roman 8:26.
So our weaknesses or crippings. It like a medical connotation, suggesting the way a nurse helps in the healing process.
So the Holy Spirit becomes our partner and helper, who works along with us in a mutual participation, for our healing.
We do not know what we ought ot be paraying for. We often do not receive, because we ask for the wrong things.
I think that the list is the symptoms of depression, not really the cause. For example, if you cannot fall asleep within 15-30 minutes after going to bed, or if you can't get restful sleep, this could be an indicator of a depressive cycle. The cluttered home can also show a lack of concern for personal upkeep, which is yet another indicator of depression. These things can keep someone from recovering from depression sooner than you might think they should, sure; but I don't always see them as CAUSES for an unresolvable depression.
It's a great list, by the way.
justme
cm
@tau_1@xanga - Yes, read thru Romans 7:15 (?)- 8:34. 'The Message' version does a FANTASTIC job in communicating what Paul was saying!! LAW--
@IMChurchmouse@xanga - Indeed, from my perspective, this was exactly what I experienced. I got to sleep after about 20 minutes at nite, but woke up at 2:00 in the morning, unable to get back to sleep at all. Since I was lifted out of my condition (depression), I now am asleep 10 minutes in & wake up just before my alarm goes off at 4:45 AM. LAW--
Unfortunately your post does not reveal the depression that your brother in Christ was suffering. Depression has nothing to do with what you eat or drink, or watch. May be for some extent, but on the whole it is a chemical imbalance that might need treatment from a Dr. And your answer did not really help.
I suffer from Depression anxiety, and already the person who approached you is ridden with pain... and these questions are not going to help him. I hope to God, that that, person, found the right answer. To find a Dr.