Sunday, 18 October 2009
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Sometimes We Don't Realize We're Filthy: Sin Scars and Forgiveness
Sometimes you don’t realize how dirty something is until you clean it. I was in the bathroom today, getting ready to take a shower, when I noticed that the toilet could be a little cleaner. So I got out my cleaning stuff and went to work. I had already started cleaning, I might as well continue, right? Well, I looked over past the toilet and noticed that the shower could be a little cleaner. Matthew works late and usually takes a shower right when he gets home. “I bet he’d enjoy a sparkling clean shower,” I thought to myself. So I began to clean the shower. We store our cleaning supplies for the bathroom beneath the sink. So, after the shower was clean, I walked over to the sink and began putting stuff away. The sink looked clean until I set a wet sponge down on it. The area where the water was began to shine and it was then that I noticed that the sink was actually filthy. So I cleaned it off.
My mind is rarely still; it likes to wander. If I’m not singing in my head, I’m thinking about something in my life. Maybe that’s why cleaning the sink made me think about God and forgiveness.
Actually, this thought started earlier in the day. I was driving down the road, thinking about the verse in Psalms that says that God casts your sin as far from you as the east is to the west if you are His child. Sometimes I ask for forgiveness for things, but I still remember the sin that I did. So I ask forgiveness again. Sometimes I find that I keep asking God for forgiveness, in hopes that one day I will forget that sin.
If my sin is that I said something hurtful to someone, I ask God for forgiveness (and often that person, too), but the memory of that sin sticks in my head.
I was thinking today about how asking forgiveness is an act that we do. And God, in return, washes away our sin – but He doesn’t wash away our memory of that sin. Sins and memories are two completely different things. I guess that memory is like a scar – a sin memory is like an invisible scar that won’t go away, because scars just don’t leave. And I guess having such “scars” is good because it reminds us not to do the same thing in the future.
God doesn’t require that we FEEL forgiven. He just requires that we ask for forgiveness. And that’s so very comforting – that I know I am forgiven even if I still feel bad about what I did.
But, back to the sink thoughts: I wonder how many people don’t stop throughout the day or even at the end of the day to confess all of their sins to God and ask to be forgiven for them. And, if we aren’t taking the time to point out those sins to ourself and ask forgiveness, how many of us are deceived by the illusion of cleanness – how many of us don’t realize how many filthy things we have done throughout the day because we don’t ever take the time to “clean up”; to let God wash us white as snow. There could be some really filthy people among us - and I'm sometimes included in that group!
Do you have sin scars? Have you asked God for forgiveness, but don't feel forgiven sometimes? How do you get over them?
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About the Author
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- From: florida2008@xanga
- Name: Christina
- About Me: I love Jesus Christ. I love my husband, Matthew. We do everything together and have a great time. I carry my camera everywhere and love unveiling the hidden beauty of our world. I love being outdoors and love all of nature, especially cute critters. I love experiencing weather - sunshine is my favorite, but I like thunderstorms, too. My favorite place to be is the beach. I love to read and usually have about 6 books started at the same time. Sometimes I finish them, sometimes I don't. I have a pink journal and it stays on my coffe table for any curious reader to look through. I don't keep secrets of my own - I don't see the point in hiding things from the world. I love my family, my friends, and my hometown of Traverse City.
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Comments (11)
If we have been saved by grace through faith in Jesus Christ, His blood has covered all our sin, all of it! Yes, we can be forgiven and not feel it and those feelings of guilt can haunt us. We need to keep immersing ourselves in the Scripture and the reminder of God's full forgiveness to us in Christ. Hebrew is a great book to look through, to see the promises of forgiveness are based on God's work on our behalf through Jesus Christ. I would encourage those who are having trouble with guilt over past sin you've already confessed and repented of to read the book of Hebrews. For example we find these wonderful assurances there for the believer:
After making purification for sins, he [God's Son] sat down at the right hand of the Majesty on high... Hebrews 1:3b
For I will be merciful toward their iniquities, and I will remember their sins no more. Hebrews 8:12.
And by that will we have been sanctified through the offering of the body of Jesus Christ once for all.
11 And every priest stands daily at his service, offering repeatedly the same sacrifices, which can never take away sins.
12 But when Christ had offered for all time a single sacrifice for sins, he sat down at the right hand of God,
13 waiting from that time until his enemies should be made a footstool for his feet.
14 For by a single offering he has perfected for all time those who are being sanctified.
Hebrews 10:10-14
In addition to those external assurances of forgiveness, we can ask God to speak an inner assurance to our heart through His Holy Spirit, similar to Romans 8:16. God does not want HIs children to be fearful or doubtful, or in bondage to past sin that we've already confessed. We have not received a spirit of fear but a spirit of adoption. How can we truly enjoy our position as children of God and the joy of His salvation if we continue to feel guilt, remorse and regret over our past sin?
I don't ask for forgiveness. If I did, I would be spending the majority of my day asking for forgiveness. I'm just not deserving enough.
I JOHN 1:5-10 5This is the message which we have heard from Him and declare to you, that God is light and in Him is no darkness at all. 6If we say that we have fellowship with Him, and walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. 7But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin.
8 If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. 9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 10 If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His word is not in us.
There are a lot of "If's" in those few scripture verses of I JOHN, but the most important one to me is verse 9.
Sometimes we get so comfortable with our sin, we don't see it as sin...
But aren't scars irreversiible? They heal over time, true, but they're still emblazoned on our hearts. No matter how hard we try to hide them, sometimes we can't forget. For me, there comes a point in time when the scars cease to be a reminder to be good and begin to remind me of the 23749+ reasons that I can never be clean. It's kind of depressing.
Good post, though. It's comforting to see that people have not lost the art of singing to themselves.
Isaiah 64:4-9
Leviticus 15:19-24 And if a woman have an issue, and her issue in her flesh be blood, she shall be put apart seven days: and whosoever toucheth her shall be unclean until the even. {20} And every thing that she lieth upon in her separation shall be unclean: every thing also that she sitteth upon shall be unclean. {21} And whosoever toucheth her bed shall wash his clothes, and bathe himself in water, and be unclean until the even. {22} And whosoever toucheth any thing that she sat upon shall wash his clothes, and bathe himself in water, and be unclean until the even. {23} And if it be on her bed, or on any thing whereon she sitteth, when he toucheth it, he shall be unclean until the even. {24} And if any man lie with her at all, and her flowers be upon him, he shall be unclean seven days; and all the bed whereon he lieth shall be unclean.
The Jews whom Jesus had driven from the temple claimed to be children of Abraham, but they fled from the Saviour's presence because they could not endure the glory of God which was manifested in Him. So, they gave evidence that they were not fitted by the grace of God to participate in the sacred services of the temple.
They were zealous to maintain an appearance of holiness, but they neglected holiness of heart. While they were sticklers for the letter of the law, they were constantly violating its spirit. Their great nedd was that very change which Christ had been explaining to Nicodemus,
a new moral birth, a cleansing from sin, and a renewing of knowledge and holiness.
There was no exuse for the blindness of Israel in regard to the work of regeneration. "We are all as an unclean thing, and all our righteousnesses are as filthy rage." "Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me."
@ultravioletskies08@xanga -but thats like saying that your sins are so bad and so big that even the power of God cant take it away right?
your worst days and worst sins are never so bad that you are beyond the reach of God's grace..
there's
this little story that always seem to get me..i always feel emotional
as i read the story.i hope it will give u the hope that it gave me in
my time of need.
http://godslittleacre.net/inspirationalstories/come_as_you_are.html
@christykim@xanga - please read what i gave ultravioletskies08..heh i just dnt knw how to reply to two comments in one message.hehe new to this replying thing.heh
@careben2552@xanga - I know that's what it's like. That's not what I meant by my comment.... I already know how filthy I am, I know already. I'm sure God could forgive me, I wouldn't deny that, but I NEVER feel forgiven. That's what this post is about in the first place. I don't want to spend everyday telling God how filthy I am.... it'll take too long. And I don't deserve to be forgiven to begin with. That's all I'm saying.....
*Oh, and when you want to reply to folks, just press the reply at my comment, then directly after, hit the reply under christykim's comment.... and that way your same comment will go to the both of us =)
@ultravioletskies08@xanga - thanks for telling me how!heh.and i get where ur comin from.i knw how that feels too.but something that always gets me through this is that..He WANTS us to keep asking for forgiveness..i really dont know how to explain it.and i dont want to risk trying cuz i dont want to give u the wrong idea or something..ill pray for you =D and thanks for tellin me how to do that replying thing.hehe thanks and God bless.
@careben2552@xanga - Oh... one of those unexplicable things..... well ok, I guess. And sure, it's no problem about the replying thing... it's a pretty useful tool when you get the hang of it.
@careben2552@xanga - Thanks for the reply! Like violetskies said, I don't really feel forgiven for my sins-- that "empty" feeling doesn't last long. I try not to dwell on it, but once I start thinking about all of the things that happened to me (and all of the things I've done), and about how I keep asking for God for forgiveness. It's like I'm sitting on the middle of the fence, and I'm not exactly completely there yet: I don't follow the rules of the world because I know that I can live a different path, but at the same time, it's so hard to just... forget. So I brood on things, wallowing in my own self-misery while, at the same time, I wish for redemption, when in reality the brooding part is chasing His forgiveness away (in a way).
Gah I sound like a broken record. It's kind of hard to express. X|