Tuesday, 15 September 2009
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When College Gets Between You and God
Recently, I've been having a very avid struggle between my sanity and my schoolwork. As an average-to-under-average student when it comes to math, my aerospace engineering major has caused me to have to work harder than all of my fellow students and fail more often no matter how hard I work. It gets very tough sometimes, to the point in which I'll break down and cry over another failed assignment or another impossible problem that I can't solve without the crutch of my professors that I am constantly using. Last year, my work load wasn't as terrible. I had time for video games, writing, reading, and most importantly, going to church. But this year, I've had to cross church off my list of activities simply because there aren't enough hours in the week for me to do my work. When I'm not in class for 9 hours straight, I'm having to wake up early and start my homework, which includes- you guessed it- Sundays. For the first couple weeks, I wasn't needing to do my work until after lunch, which made plenty of time to go to church. But now, with my homework getting more difficult and increasingly time consuming (multiple professors claim their assignments will take the whole week to do, which is completely and utterly true), I'm going to have to wake up before those bells ring in order to do what my fellow engineering classmates can do in half the time.
I still have time for prayers and some light Bible studying before I go to bed every night, but that's it. In the past, I've assumed my struggles were due to God's plan for me. Everyone struggles, and I don't want to quit because I've wanted to do this my whole life. At least, when it was still a romantic dream of space travel and whatnot. I personified my struggles as the path to do God's will because I know God doesn't want me taking the easy way out. But now, with that path getting in the way of getting to know my Lord and Savior better, I'm not so sure anymore.
How do I know that I'm doing (or, subsequently, not doing) what He wants for me? I haven't questioned in the past that God would put me on a path that has tested me to the very literal brink of my sanity, my faith in Him, and my faith in the people around me. I also know that God wouldn't have me do His will if I couldn't do it.
Would God put me on a path to do his will that, in turn, took Him out of the picture?
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About the Author
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- From: harmonyminusmelody@xanga
- Name: Evan
- About Me: in reference to my username, i have been since acquainted with my melody and we shout to the heavens our concordant song of life and love. i am a lover, a God-fearer, a space enthusiast, an aerospace engineer in-training, a writer, a gamer. i am lazy, opinionated, overweight, overbearing, and full of myself, but honestly, WHO ISN'T?!? at least i can say i'm not full of YOURSELF.
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Comments (12)
While I was studying theology at Harding University I came to a realization; Satan was using my studies in greek, Church History, Hermineutics, and the like to distract me and lead me away from Gods plan in my life. In my case there were many factors that I have now realized contributed to this conclusion such as the financial load required to obtain that level of education which would prevent me from taking lower paying positions. Had I stayed there to finish out my degree I would not be used the way I am now-- but had I not gone there in the first place, I also would be unable to do what I am doing. I received what I needed to receive from the University in order to do what God wanted me to do now.
However, one of the primary reasons I came to such a conclusion, even while studying in depth levels of scripture, doctrine and theology, is that I noticed a complete lack in actual service. Not only was I in a consistently dull mood and my demonstration of patience towards other people was lower than normal, but I was not able to serve my community and witness for Christ.
I think you need to look at scriptures such as Philippians 2:2,3; 6-8 and Galatians 5:22. Through sincere prayer only you can answer if your pursuit is enabling you to do Gods will, or disabling you. We're often taken through the fire to purify us-- perhaps God is using this time to reveal to you attributes that need to be developed and strengthend while staying in school.
Equally possible is the option that you may be feeling Gods absense because he has something else in store for your future that you have not yet foreseen and this time spent agonizing over your studies is not aiding in this plan God has for you. Perhaps also he is asking you what you value most in your life; education/secure future, or 1 additional second spent in hte presence of God.
Like I said, these are questions that you can only answer if you spend time praying and examining your life. I encourage you NOT to quit your pursuit of education just because it is difficult; only if you honestly feel that it is becoming a problem, which it can become one.
I had the same problem, although my conflict was athletics related: workouts scheduled on Sundays. Fortunately, at my college, there was a service at 12 midnight on Saturday, and also one at 6 pm on Sundays. I hope you can also find a service that fits your tight schedule!
I have the same problem. I never, ever have enough hours in a week to get all of my assignments in. The way I keep God in my life is that on Sunday mornings, I have two friends of the same denomination who will stop by my apartment and we will all go to church together. It is easier to keep God in your life when you have friends who also want to keep God in their lives. Even if I only take that one hour a week to spend with God, I have the support of my friends to help me keep Him there. Surround yourself with a buddy or two who also want to spend time with God.
I feel your pain, most Sundays I feel very sleep deprived, but I make time anyway!
1.) God Rested. I've found in my studies (I have two majors and a minor; I don't remember what it's like to not have 18 credits) that it's always good to (a.) get enough sleep, and (b.) take at least one night off per week (or in your case, possibly on morning off). It's counter-intuitive that you can get your work done with less time, but you really are more productive during the time you are working such that you can get a lot more done...and you save money by not drinking as much caffeine.
2.) You're a self-proclaimed average-at-best math student. Are you sure God's calling you into Aeroengin, which is arguably the most math-intensive form of engineering? How much have you prayed about this?
change majors?
" As an average-to-under-average student when it comes to math, my aerospace engineering major has caused me to have to work harder than all of my fellow students and fail more often no matter how hard I work."
I'd say that's your problem right there. Reflect on why you're in a program that's...ah, not favorable with your academic strengths. Is such a pursuit worth the position you're currently in?
Then again, I'm a so-so science student who wants to switch his major into nursing, so I can't speak.
Just because something is difficult doesn't necessarily mean it's God's will. And realizing that the actual work of a discipline isn't suited for you doesn't make you a quitter. (That's one thing college is good for.)
Maybe there's another way to realize your dream that would involve less math. "Work smarter, not harder" -- Ancient corporate proverb
"I once wanted to be a Shakespearean actor, but it was not to be." -- Anonymous.
pray and ask God where he wants you to be.
i have been praying very much lately about this and i have in fact struggled with this since the first day of freshman year, over a year ago. it all hits me at once and i freak out and get scared, but then i realize that God has given me two passions: space and writing. one can provide for a family, and one (usually) can not.
however, i don't think God wants my writing talent to go to waste. on any downtime i have, i write and proofread a book that i've been writing for a year. i don't know which is my bigger passion, but i know that there's nothing against doing both. and hopefully i can go the isaac asimov route and be an engineer for a while and then, once i got some notoriety in my writing, i could jump ship.
God is good. :)
Try giving G-d some time in the morning and hitting the church once or twice a month if not so regularly. Church is to refresh the soul and be rejuvenating- give you some fellowship. But we all know as much as we need that, G-d is everywhere. So just, and I learned this the hard way, only make friends at school with people who love G-d. Then you have your fellowship at school. You don't have to be all gooky about it though.
God clearly states that being in community is vital to following Him. Check out Acts 2:42-47 for reminding of this.
Just pray about it. Set apart some time for you and God, one on one, silence. And listen.
I hope everything works out for you!
is your God schoolwork/academic success? or is your God his Plans for you? or is your God, simply God?
this is something i used to ask myself, alot. I used to be a premed student, and like all premed student, i was very very keen. but to make sure I wouldn't idolize schoolwork over God, I disciplined myself to pray/ do devos for 3 hours a day. I'm not recommending this type of thing for everyone, but hey, it got me focused on God, and made me not idolize my career path. Kept my priority straight
(I ended up doing surprisngly well in that year. Straight A. But I switched program because I realized I didn't want to become a doctor).
I mean, at the end of the day, God is much bigger than some science problems. Honor God first, then honor your schoolwork. God honors those who honors Him, no? Even if you fail school, at least you know you honored God and kept your priorities right.
Martin Luther King JR used to say something to the extent of, "I got this to do today, I got that to do today, and I got blajsdljadlkfj to do today, and that's why I have to pray longer than usual today" I can't remember the quote, but the gist of it was that the busier he got, the more he prayed/ the more relient upon God he was.