I think anybody's kids shouldn't be "tied down" to a lifestyle chosen by their parents.

@Romans_837@xanga - Agreed. When a parent dedicates their life to any kind of work, it will effect the child's upbringing. And pastors kids face some unique challenges and situations. But as long the parent is equally dedicated to separately raising and caring for their children, I don't think pastor's kids are more likely to become any worse or better than they were gonna be anyways.

On a less tasteful note,
Whenever we'd meet a pastor with young tot-and-under children, me and my friends used to try to predict what they were going to be like when they grow up. (dominatrices, respected atheistic authors,  pop star sex icons, Buddhist monks, abortion advocates, sex toy inventors, founders of new psychedelic narcotics, etc). I guess I still do sometimes, but I truly have cut back.

I think they ought to act like Christians. 

A "spiritual person" (or Christian) who rarely prayers, reads the bible, or even goes to Church???

Parenting is the biggest single factor in children's behavior, security, and happiness. One of the biblical requirements for church leaders is to be good parents: "An elder must be blameless, the husband of but one wife, a man whose children believe and are not open to the charge of being wild and disobedient." (Titus 1:6)  Unfortunately, not all pastors are good parents, especially when it comes to balancing work and family time and staying involved in their children's lives.

Among PKs and missionary kids, I've seen the spectrum. It's hard being in the typical church fishbowl, but good parents create a safe space for the family and establish boundaries (hard to maintain if you're a pastor). I think pastors' kids may have it tougher than missionary kids.

I don't think ANYONE should act like a Christian, or act like anything. I think they should be.

Anyways, I was a preacher's kid, and in some ways it made me grow up faster. I didn't have the freedoms other kids had. But I also learned more about life's truths, and I have a better mindset because of some experiences with churches(as painful as they were). But I would never want any other kid to go through that stuff. It may do them some good, but it could also do a lot of damage. I have great parents who protected me, and didn't take crap, because they knew it would hurt us kids. Someone who had a butt of a minister-parent may feel differently. I personally wouldn't change the past, but I wouldn't live it again. I'm glad my dad retired from ministry. And unless you've seen some of the crap of churches,(jealousy, greed, power-hunger, etc.) you can't say what a preacher's kid should be like. Each pk has his or her own story, each one has his or her own scars. They must choose their own path.

I'm a good kid, I get good grade, I don't drink or do drugs. I don't try to rebel from the church or my parents. I'm a bit of a rebel of society, but I'm not dangerous. I use good common sense, and I have a bit of a dark side. I see good and bad in almost everything. I can sense some things others can't, because all my life I've had to judge how to choose my words, or how to handle a situation. I don't know if other pks can do this, but I can pretty much tell when someone doesn't like you and just has to be nice to you, versus whether he or she is just genuinly nice. If someone doesn't feel like being all cheery nice, I don't want. I want politeness, that's all.

@thornbird42@xanga - Ohhh-- yes. you can definitely make up your own concept of faith, spirituality, or religion (etc).

I'm a pastor's kid and I most definitely rebelled.
Mostly because I grew up in a church where everyone lied, cheated and were just plain hypocrites. I left the church, joined a different church (and demomniation, although still Christianity) and left again. I guess I'm kind of lost on that aspect.
I truly believe that pastor's kids are put on this pedestal that they have no business being on. No one cares if the neighbor's kid smokes pot but when the pastor's kid does it, it's horrendous? I definitely feel that everyone needs to find their way (whether it's their parents' or not) and leave labels to cans because we are all human.

I agree with those who have said only minister's kids can really understand their situation. That being said, I am a minister's kid, so I can offer my perspective.

I was probably more on the "angelic" side; honestly, I was "trained" to be so aware of what others would think of me (or my parents), I was afraid to do anything other than that. Still, growing up, there was always an intense longing to be considered normal. As a teen especially, I wanted my peers to be okay with telling me about the crazy parties, even though I knew I would never go myself. I guess I tried to walk the line between "super Christian" and "normal," but it was tough. I also agree that as a minister's kid, you see the dark side of church operations (in my case, we were mostly at the butt of it), and it is jading.

Once I went to college and got some space from my parents and their church, I felt safer to figure out and adopt my own "Christian opinions" (for example, is it okay for Christians to drink?). In my parents' household, having different opinions would have been frowned upon, so getting out on my own is one of the best things that could have happened to me. I love my parents, but I prefer to love them from a distance. As a result of all this, I have held onto the faith and managed to evolve into my own beliefs.

So, short answer: Yes, there is a balance, but it can be difficult to find, and pretty much nobody gets out without some scars.

Gah! I'm a preacher's kid. It wasn't fun. Especially the time he brought me up to the pulpit during one of his sermons and talked about child suicide. For the longest time, I was afraid he'd call me up there again. Or the time he had the Pastor place his hand on my head and pray for me in front of the entire congregation, because I wasn't baptized at the time.

To add more..

I saw a youth pastor whom I though was genuine and had a family of 5 kids and a lovely wife get caught having an affair with a 16 year old.

I saw a pastor wellr espected in the community get arrested for molesting teen girls.

I have seen more than one pastor get caught in an affair.

Pastors addicted to porn, caught up in homosexuality.......so on and so on  all friends of my dad or ministers I met while in seminary.   I will not mention my dads mistakes. I can honestly say maybe 5% of ministers I have met, I respect and I have met many.

After seeing all of that I still cannot  walk away from the One who was strong enough to forgive all those sins and was strong enough to die a horrible death  while knowing the world would still reject him and those he called to serve would still hurt him with their sins.  I learned a long tim ago that the work is God's not any mans!!

For example:

The man who helped God start the church, Peter hurt Jesus and rejected him before God used him to do so.

One of the greatest missionaries ever (Paul)was an enemy of the church before being used and even after being used greatly, still called himself the cheif of sinners.

History is full of sinners that God has used greatly.

All we can do individually is look in the mirror and see the sinner we are and ask God's forgiveness and for the grace to forgive others. We are so fixated on others (PKs, pastors, MKs etc) that we dont take time to look at ourselves and see that we have become what we hate!

           I think that PK's have it the worse. The pastor is always held on a pedestal and so is his or her family. Being pretty close to the pastors that I have known I've seen both sides of PK's though I am not one myself. The pressure to perform to the conditions of others who could care less about your personal life or struggles can break any person.
But we are all sinners and God is merciful and awesome. In answer to your question-the person who is in that position (if they are a christian) according to the moral guidelines as outlined by their spiritual Father. If they aren't christians well then...that's a whole 'nother can of worms.

I have a cousin who is a PK. He's a good kid but he's said and done some things I'm sure would make his parents do a double take. But they're also pretty liberal. His dad did give him a youth religion book about sex. But other than that, they don't impose religion on him or anyone else. They'll make suggestions every now and then, however. Like, to pray or seek a certain scripture. But it's not like they'd cast him out the home. He gets good grades and is pretty much the average teenager. He's very talented and I've watched him grow from a little crying bundle to a smooth young man.
His elder siblings, however, are the rebels. They've all calmed down a bit, but, there are lots of stories about the naught they've pulled off in their haydays. They were all over the place having fun, having the babies, and pretty much giving my uncle a run for his money for a minute. As they got older, they cooled off. And somehow, they all ended up coming back home to live around their dad. One has even come back to the church.

I think that PKs are judged because of who their parents are. By everyone. They are indeed expected to be one way or the other. And if they take the so-called "lower road", then they are the gossip and the bane on everyone's lips and mind. I think that in the end, the kids are going to form their own personalities based on what their parents have taught them. And from there, they go their own way.