Monday, 22 December 2008
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The Struggle Against Complacency and How I'm Battling It
Guest post submitted by crevis05
I was just reading through my journal, and this is something I wrote:
My life is about me. Everything I do is to make me feel better about myself, to make me feel like I matter. Even being a Christian, I think I'm only a Christian because it makes me feel better. It gives me hope for this world. I want so much to lose myself. I will get lost, either to Satan or God. There is this battle for my soul, and I don't know the outcome. I want so bad to love God, to be a true disciple, but I am complacent. I know what I must do, but I have no urgency. There is no reason for me to read my Bible daily or to pray, but in reality their is. I could die tomorrow. Have I done enough to get into heaven? I doubt it. I love God, but that's not enough, faith without works is dead.
I was depressed, terribly depressed. It's amazing to me, how I can look back, and see how much I was struggling, and be thankful for it. I was lost 6 months ago. I saw it coming, but I still did nothing about it. God was right there beside me the whole time, but I had no idea, I didn't feel connected at all.
So, why am I not depressed now? Well I live in a house with 4 other awesome guys. Two of whom, I call my best friends. They help me more than anything in my walk, and I'm very grateful for them. I have been reading, and studying lately. It should be everyone's priority to have some sort of contact with scripture everyday.I'm more connected at my church than I have probably ever been. I play in the praise band, and I help out with the youth group. I love playing my guitar. So that really helps. Just doing things I love is a plus. The youth group is amazing also. The youth teach me something every week.
I have always struggled with complacency. If I do the same things every week, I won't grow. I need to be changing constantly. I need to be working on something new. I guess that's part of the reason I feel so passionate about building wells in a third world country.
When you get depressed about life, what do you do to fix it? There really isn't a quick fix usually. So, what makes you get out of your funk?
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About the Author
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- From: crevis05@xanga
- Name: Travis
- Location: Lima, Ohio, United States
- About Me: I have this deep desire of late to help people. Mostly the poor, decrepit, hurt people. Which is just about everyone. So, I'm trying to figure out what God wants me to do about it.
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Comments (12)
I put in my Life is a Highway CD and take a nice ride in my rocket, my fast as lightning MR2. I take off the T-tops and let the sun warm my hair and let the cool mountain air whisp me away. I ride through the mountains and take in God's amazing beauty. When your Spirit is that relaxed, it would be very hard to be depressed. There is just something about beautiful clouds and fresh mountain air that just lighten my load, :)
half of me is all about apathy.
and the other half just doesn't care.
I could die tomorrow. Have I done enough to get into heaven? I doubt it. I love God, but that's not enough, faith without works is dead.
To the author: I don't know if you still feel this way, but you don't do anything to get to heaven. It is a free gift of God. Jesus blood is what pays your way into heaven. Have you done enough? The answer is an emphatic NO! Could you ever do enough? NO!
It is by His grace you are saved, not your works, it is a gift of God.
Check out Ephesians 2, Romans (the whole book is great on this topic), etc.
Yes, faith without works is dead, but it is out of your genuine commitment to Him that you will produce good works. Your works will never save you.
Awesome, Trav! you were featured! You rock. They even linked your Let's Build a Well Site!
I toads agree with you. It's tough.
"Have I done enough to get into heaven? I doubt it."
bingo! and you never will...nor will i or anyone else!!! thank GOD salvation isn't about works. it is about simply accepting the free gift that God has already given you. Jesus Christ. His Son.
i pray you don't actually still feel this way! we all have our moments of self doubt. hope this was just one of yours!!
@philippians4_13@xanga -
@bcom_Abby@xanga -
This was definitely just a moment of self doubt. I was depressed, and I blamed myself for everything.
glad to hear it! i have moments when i wonder why God even puts up with me and my shenanigans! it is SOOOOO a good thing that i am not God. i would have struck me down a looooong time ago!!
"My life is about me"
I've struggled with the same thought recently. doesn't it seem like becoming a christian is about saving yourself?? (God saving you but really...the decision to try and save yourself) wasn't it simpler times when you could just love God for Him....to be in His presence. Isn't the reason most people get into christianity selfish? and maybe love for God will follow. what do you think?
and to get out of it... i write a lot, fold up the piece of paper, and throw it in this drawer of my "thoughts;" it is then considered out of my mind.
<3
@justmysecretspace9@xanga - I myself didn't become a Christian for selfish reasons. I really wanted God. On the other hand, I think people make Christianity what they want, and hope God is on board with them. Which is completely backward, and dumb.
i agree with you. i think that is one of the big paradoxes about life--when things are not all good and settled, we strive to settle things, like fix our love life, finances, church life, etc. but when we do reach a place that is relatively smooth and cushy, things get stagnant.
right now i am at a place where most things are smooth and right. i am enjoying it. usually the opposite depresses me--when things are all chaotic and messed up, i get overwhelmed and depressed. right now i am enjoying things, like a rest from the storm.
i think there is Biblical basis behind feeling satisfied and content. it is a blessing i think, if not for God's blessing, how could things be good and smooth in all these areas of a messed up life?
but anyway. complacency is indeed different. i guess when a believer reaches a comfortable place, after God has blessed them with stability and success, i think He asks that we do His work. in fact i think we are supposed to do His work even when things are not smooth. and there should always be more we can do, whether it be evangelizing or helping the needy or build up other Christians--there will always be work to do.
it is great that you are stretching yourself and looking into what He would want you to do. i guess that is the way to keep going and not be stagnant
I have to say that I have been where you are...but, it was when I was not IN His Word. I would challenge you to ask how many Bible studies you've undertaken since your salvation experience...not for the 'doing' but for the 'getting to know' your Savior. Christianity is about a love relationship! That's all!! But, that's everything!!! At the very core of our belief system is LOVE. You should get to KNOW our Savior--really KNOW Him....understanding His character and what He's at work doing.
About 'doing'-- faith without works is dead, that's true! But nothing great is expected overnight. Abraham waited 10 years before God gave him Isaac. Moses waited 40 years in the desert before God used him to rescue his people from Egypt. See NOW as God's opportunity to build your character and establish his relationship with you so that He will prepare you to JOIN Him where He is already at work..and believe me He's at work all around us. Only when you can understand His character and KNOW His voice will you be able do 'DO' anything in His service.
Start in God's Word and study it! Look for studies that interest you...there are TONS out there. Get a good study Bible--like the Life Application Study Bible to help guide you to a better understanding of applying the truths in His Word to your life! One study I would suggest is Experiencing God by Henry Blackaby! It's very good!
God Bless You!