by mr palmI LOVE the praise and approval of men (and women)! I wish that I could say that it didn't matter, but when I look at so many areas of my life, it's the case.
At work, I am probably too concerned with how my boss views my work, and go a little overboard to make sure that I look good in their eyes. As a member of a band that considered pursuing a record contract, I thrived on the approval of concert promoters and contacts in the music industry. I'm also a screenwriter – one of only 8.2 million others in New York City (population 8.3 million). When I email people to see if they're interested in a script, I allow positive feedback to send my spirit soaring in ways that I should only let the Spirit of God do.
In what seems written directly for me, Paul says in Galatians:
Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ. – Galatians 1:10
In context, Paul is referring to others preaching a gospel other than the one that the Galatians accepted. I think that verse 10 can liberally applied to life in general.
There's nothing wrong with wanting to be a good employee or a successful musician, writer, or anything else. But I can tell that I allow approval to have a heavy influence on my emotional disposition. It's not healthy, because there's always going to criticism, seldom constructive, and I won't be able to please everyone. If I can fortify myself on God's approval, then life will go a lot smoother, and I'll be a happier person in the end.
How much do you let the approval of others affect you?
Comments (10)
all too much, sometimes.
I think that we need accountability, so there is a balance to giving attention to feedback. There are many people out there who are so full of themselves that they don't hear/listen to other people's feedback on what they are doing.
Otherwise, I think I am one of those who always rebuts a compliment. I had to learn how to accept sincere ones as the gifts that they were meant to be. I also need encouragement from time to time, and I need to learn to accept that when it comes my way.
I think we are the two extremes, LOL!
Wow this post really, really sucks. It's poorly written and doesn't make any sense. No wonder you're not a successful screenwriter.
Just kidding. I was just in the mood for some irony with the topic. I think I have the opposite problem sometimes. I care too little about what anyone else thinks...
people are always like that...
it's really God's approval we should be seeking...
i guess i really don't struggle with the approval of man...
but then again, I do need to know what is acceptable say when I'm playing a part on the worship team and of something doesn't fly or sound right then the leader needs to tell me in which case I need to be humble enough to receive and change it...
I don't think of it as approval. My love language is words of affirmation. I need others to tell me that I am doing well because that is what touches my heart. I feel generally bad at my job is no one is telling me that I am doing well. I do the best job I can because I want to do a good job, it simply makes me smile when someone else tells me that I have done a good job. I refuse to feel bad about that.
I dont think its wrong to be affirmed as long as the affirmation doesnt contradict what God would affirm us for. Also being disappointed when people dont praise us can be a problem too because we are valuing God's opinion of us as less then what man does
I really appreciate your honesty here.
I am definitely affected by what people think. It can get me to the point where I shrink back from obedience because I'm fearful about getting a bad response from people. I have to remember I am serving the Lord Christ and not fear men (Matt. 10) and press on in obedience no matter what others might think.
I really have found the story of Baruch in Jeremiah 45 helpfu/instructionall. Baruch was seeking great things for himself and when he didn't get them he became despondent. The Lord rebuked him for his self-seeking attitude.
More than I should!
Aaugh, I have the same problem. I care so much about what others think of me, but I'm realizing that needs to change. Maybe a practical step is to cut off my thoughts when I start dwelling on the opinions of others.
I appreciate it when someone sincerely takes note of what I have done and comments favorably. I believe it is ungracious and insulting to dismiss the compliment out of hand. Like any other gift we receive, a compliment or affirmation is to be received in good faith. Even if the feedback seems to be flattery, it is in poor taste to call someone down for it - always be loving in your response.
Personally, I don't get a great many compliments, but if I know in my heart that I have done my best, I leave the choice of recognition to the other person. I want to grow to the point where I only look to God for affirmation first.
But, yeah, I do like to be told that I'm doing a good job!