by miss marigold It seems like every Sunday, our pastor announces at least one new engagement (in fact, one week, there were 4....) He always jokingly asks that us singletons not get discouraged because God provides (whether His provision be a future spouse or contentment with singleness.)
I find the announcements cute, and far from being discouraged, I like wondering if I'm next on the list - like I'm bound to find someone, someday, if everyone else is. Then again, I know a lot of people who hate hearing about new couples because it makes them feel insecure...like, "I can't believe Sally got engaged before I did. Now there's definitely no hope for me," or they don't like being reminded that having someone is just as good (maybe better) as being single. Admittedly, I'd probably experience some difficulty being really happy for the engaged couples if all of them were close friends of mine and I were still single.
Do you enjoy hearing engagement announcements at church?
Comments (18)
I don't have too much reaction. I would congratulate them.
p.s. those candies are beautiful, I want to learn how to make them!
I don't go to church, but I see no problem with having engagement announcements in a church. If one or both are actively involved in the church and have a lot of friends there, it seems fitting that they would want to share it at the church. To solve the singles insecurity thing, it might be more tactful to put it in the church bulletin rather than announce it in the pulpit.
But I also think couples should be able to announce their engagement without worrying that it will make single people "insecure." It's a big event in life. It's only a problem when the engagement becomes all that the couple will talk about with their friends, or they are constantly badgering the single friend about being single, or trying to set them up or whatever. Saying, "hey! We're getting married!" isn't the same as, "I'm getting married and you're not. What's the matter with you?"
Please notice that the primary and strong emotions in this blog are about "Me, Me, Me!"
People who feel jealous or insecure about what happens to others need to get over it!
"Me, Me, Me!" is "SICK, SICK, SICK!"
I would probably quit attending the church. Not because hearing such things made me insecure or that I couldn't handle them for some reason but rather because I just don't believe that church is the correct place for such announcements. To me, if you don't know the couple well enough for them to inform you themselves in a more private manner then you have no right or need to know the information. I know my attitude is quite different from most people but to me such large scale announcements and the desire to make them and have them made comes from a place of insecurity and greed and I don't think the Church should be celebrating those things.
I think the announcements are cute, but that could just be because I'm married and don't have anything to be discouraged about.
Just congratulate them and move on. It's not the end of the world. And being in a relationship, married, engaged, etc, isn't the world.
That is where my engagement was announced. We thought it only appropriate because that is where we met, and got engaged, and where we will be getting married.
I really really love Romans 12, it has sooo many answers to our Christian walk.
14Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. 15Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. 16Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position.
[a]Do not be conceited.
I think it is lovely to celebrate with those who have things to celebrate and to cry with those who are sad.
x
I don't think it's a particularly good practise, announcing engagements from the pulpit of a church. And I think it is really inconsiderate of the pastor every time (which means nearly every week in the contributor's church) to bring a little homily to those who are single. Poor taste! And even offensive. This means the poor souls who remain single get reminded of their lowly position nearly every Sunday morning - up to 52 times per year.
I agree with Mr Colorful, I'd be out of that place fast!
oh i love it, it makes me glad to hear of it.
My church isn't big enough where we hear about things like that. If someone from the church is getting married, I hear about it or know about it before an announcement!
My husband has been at the same church for 20 years and I for 12 years. We serve on the worship team and the youth staff. One of my proudest days was when they annouced our engagement! Everyone clapped and celebrated with us. You know what my second proudest day was? When they annouced the birth of my son! It is nothing to run from, celebrating with fellow believers as a body and giving the glory to God.
eh, it's ok, we dont have that many very often since my church is a little older
Everyone have their own take on this. Personally, I think it's a way to celebrate the union (or is it after marriage?) between a man and a woman that God had brought together.
I'd more irritated about the pastor's comments about singles than I would be about the announcement. I wouldn't mind announcing the engagement and encouraging the couple, but it doesn't need to turn into a "poor single people, you'll get yours someday." I hate it when people assume that single people are unhappy and desperate, and comments like that tend to perpetuate that stereotype.
They would probably find out sooner or later, so why not find out this way?
I enjoy hearing that people are getting engaged - it's so wonderful! But I've got to admit, it does bug me when people get engaged after maybe one year when I've been with mine for nearly five years... (We're in college and want to wait, so meh.) For one, this isn't exactly a good start to a marriage - 1 year isn't all that much experience to decide to spend your life together, especially if you're young and don't know what you're doing... And also, it's just silly jealousy, I guess. Hahah.
not really, but I don't mind hearing it as well.
It can get discouraging when all of your good friends are getting married. Most of my friends are married. There are only three of my good friends that are not married and one is getting married this summer. It gets frustrating when people are always asking me well when are you going to get married, or do you have a boy friend yet.
I personally would rather hear from the couple if they are going to get married or word of mouth. Word will get around even if you don't have it announced in public.