Guest post submitted by NotOfHereButForHereWhat makes a man a man? After all, I've recently denounced my teenage years and turned 20, I'm a man now, right? Don't look at this post as what I hold to be true, but look at it like there's a big question mark in the background. I have all these questions.
I've heard that a man should be strong in his moment of weakness. Yeah, it's a little cliche, but I agree. A man should be able to see his ownflaws, to see those parts of his life where he fails his duty. Heshould see where he fails those he loves, fails his fellow man (andwoman), but most importantly, where he fails God. Every man, to really become a man, should have to acknowledge these flaws, his imperfections, and accept that he is not perfect.
Once he realizes that, he must recognize what he needs to overcome hisimperfection, because he cannot do it on his own. There is only One,One perfect being that can overcome the man's failure. Christ. As long as a man'sheart and mind is focused on Christ, held in his hand, he can be sureof his masculinity. Once a man has placed his heart in Christ, Christ fills him with those things that make a man:
GENEROSITY
A man is always generous with what he has. Time is a gift given to him,and as such, it is his most valuable asset and he should share it accordingly. They say that in this world, there are the "haves" and the"have-nots." There are those who have found Christ, andgive of their all, and those who have not. Thus a man should never fail to lend a helping hand. He was created in the image of God, and should strive to be an example of Christ for everyone.
HUMILITY
A real man is humble, he acknowledges that he is no better than anyone else, because we are all flawed. But in being humble, he should neverforget his true worth, lest he forget the true worth of others. A man'strue worth is immeasurable because he will never know the pain that was caused when God sent His Son to die, to pay the price for our souls.True humility is not thinking less of himself, or failing to acknowledge good that the does. True humility is is doing great things, accomplishing things for the good, and giving the credit to God, who isthe true Great One, the only Good.
WISDOM
A man does not need to be wise, at least in the ways that man would consider him wise. A man's goal is to emulate Christ, whose wisdomalways seemed foolish to man. What "wise" man would give without expecting anything in return? Where is the "wisdom" in considering true strength to be meekness?
For a man to be truly wise, he should not invest his life in earthly wisdom, which is primarily based on having the most toys before he die.Instead, he should seek Heavenly wisdom, which teaches him to give themost of himself to the Will of God; helping others, passing along thegifts that God has given him.
LOVE
The most difficult, and most "unwise" aspect of this kindness is loving your enemies. Where is the wisdom in showing love and kindness to those that hate you? No greater love hath any man, than to lay down his life for his FRIENDS, right? But Christ's words on the cross are a testament to His unfailing love.Could you, beaten, shamed, and dying, ask God to love and forgive those who persecuted you? If Christ could pray for those who were killing Him, how should a man act towards people who irritate, annoy, or evenanger him? With love, naturally.
What makes a man courageous or brave? This is going to sound like a broken record, but it is his love.
There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. – 1 John 4:18
Love is not the easiest, or the wisest, or even the most praised course, but since when is the right path the easy one? A man's true strength comes not from how many times he goes to the gym, or how many battles he has won, but from his ability to love. Man's strength comes from his capacity to love, and if a man has his heart in Christ, then his strength is infinite.
What other qualities describe a man? Who is a man in your life that exhibits the qualities discussed here?
Comments (25)
Testicles. He definitely needs testicles. At least at some point in his life. And a pair of XY chromosomes.
Well according to Donald Miller, a man is someone who has a penis. As simple and silly as that may sound, he actually had some insightful things to say about it. So many males are trying to figure out what it means to be a man, how they can become one. But the reality is, they already are men. There's nothing they can do to be a 'real' man. Nobody gives out trophies or awards for manhood. You don't need any approval from anyone. You are a man, so just be one.
@Theophilus166@xanga - I was going to comment, but I think that was the best response.
@FishBowlB@xanga - I second that.
lol. i'm with theophilus166 on the definition of manhood.
but i do agree that there is a definite plus to being a man of virtue, and that it is expected to accompany the passing from the teen years.
You need to fix your title -- you just described what makes a person a person.
A boy becomes a man when he commits to a woman - for life. The aforemented testicles need something good to bite in to.
This sounds good. I like this and its helpful. Thank you for the postin!
A man is someone with a penis and testicles, who is either old enough to go to jail...or vote in local, state and national elections.
Servanthood. (similar to what you called Humility--but perhaps a bit of a different twist?) Mark 10:43-45. The Son of Man came not to be served but to serve...
A good listener. (e.g.-John 6, as an example of Jesus' interactions with people.)
Unconditional love. (You mentioned love but I'll add unconditional to it--not that any human can totally fulfill this since only God can--but to encompass the idea of not loving and expecting something in return for your love.) Romans 5:8. God demonstrated His love for us in while we were yet sinners Christ died for us.
My husband on all accounts.
Thanks for this post.
self-control/maturity is probably the biggest thing that comes to my mind when "what makes a man a man"
its really wat separates boys from men
to have self-control and do wats mature and be responsible to not only yourself but to those around you
that's a man..
@sleeunit@xanga - I agree.
~V
The truest measure of a man is NOT his penis, and testicles do not make a man a man; they merely make him male.
What makes a man a man is Jesus Christ. The CROSS is the measure of a man, and nothing else. Committing oneself to a woman certainly can be a major step in being a man, but a man cannot become a man until he first commits to Jesus Christ the True Man. Some certainly are called to commit to Jesus by committing to a woman through marriage, holy God-centered and God-serving marriage. Some men are called to dedicate their lives to the church and to Christ alone. Regardless, a man cannot be a man unless he is a man through and with Christ.
I actually wrote 4 essays on the subject a while back.
1.) Put Your Shoulder To The Wheel
2.) No Sacrifice, No Victory
3.) The Common Traps and Pitfalls for the Modern Male
4.) Fatherhood is Central to Manhood
What a great post. It is always nice to see a man whose heart is after God. If you don't mind, here is a really great poem that a friend had sent me a long time ago that I feel best describes what a man (and a woman) of God is called to be: (Sorry if it bugs you how long it is, but it is beautiful)
When I became a Christian I said, Lord, now fill me in,
Tell me what I’ll suffer in this world of shame and sin.
He said, your body may be killed, and left to rot and stink,
Do you still want to follow me? I said Amen - I think.
I think Amen, Amen I think, I think I say Amen,
I’m not completely sure, can you just run through that again?
You say my body may be killed and left to rot and stink,
Well, yes, that sounds terrific, Lord, I say Amen - I think.
But, Lord, there must be other ways to follow you, I said,
I really would prefer to end up dying in my bed.
Well, yes, he said, you could put up with the sneers and scorn and spit,
Do you still want to follow me? I said Amen - a bit.
A bit Amen, Amen a bit, a bit I say Amen,
I’m not entirely sure, can we just run through that again?
You say I could put up with sneers and also scorn and spit,
Well, yes, I’ve made my mind up, and I say, Amen - a bit.
Well I sat back and thought a while, then tried a different ploy,
Now, Lord, I said, the Good book says that Christians live in joy.
That’s true he said, you need the joy to bear the pain and sorrow,
So do you want to follow me, I said, Amen - tomorrow.
Tomorrow, Lord, I’ll say it then, that’s when I’ll say Amen,
I need to get it clear, can I just run through that again?
You say that I will need to joy, to bear the pain and sorrow,
Well, yes, I think I’ve got it straight, I’ll say Amen - tomorrow.
He said, Look, I’m not asking you to spend an hour with me
A quick salvation sandwich and a cup of sanctity,
The cost is you, not half of you, but every single bit,
Now tell me, will you follow me? I said Amen - I quit.
I’m very sorry Lord I said, I’d like to follow you,
But I don’t think religion is a manly thing to do.
He said forget religion then, and think about my Son,
And tell me if you’re man enough to do what he has done.
Are you man enough to see the need, and man enough to go,
Man enough to care for those whom no one wants to know,
Man enough to say the thing that people hate to hear,
To battle through Gethsemane in loneliness and fear.
And listen! Are you man enough to stand it at the end,
The moment of betrayal by the kisses of a friend,
Are you man enough to hold your tongue, and man enough to cry?
When nails break your body-are you man enough to die?
Man enough to take the pain, and wear it like a crown,
Man enough to love the world and turn it upside down,
Are you man enough to follow me, I ask you once again?
I said, Oh Lord, I’m frightened, but I also said Amen.
Amen, Amen, Amen, Amen; Amen, Amen, Amen,
I said, Oh Lord, I’m frightened, but I also said, Amen.
By Adrian Plass … http://www.adrianplass.com/
Buffalo Hunter say boy become man when he kill him first buffalo, gut em and eat raw liver. Boy become man when he pretend to tame squaw. No man tame squaw. Just heap big lie. Boy become man when he fall to em knees and worship Jesus.
@SomethingAboutKaren@xanga - thanks for posting this (lengthy) poem. I hope you don't mind, I am sending this on to my friends in the 'Service.
Amen to Men of God.
@Theophilus166@xanga - but from how things are phrased, i am guessing the post really implies "a man" that is mature, responsible, a man of honor, and stuff like that. i mean, that is what i assumed from the way it is phrased in the topic. i don't think he was exactly just looking for "a male human that has grown past adolescence". i see that you disagree with giving men unfair pressure, and that men should be respected as men without having to jump through hoops. i understand where you are coming from, but truth is that there are too many men who act like they are children or something, and that is what brought about this whole topic. can u see where that is coming from? would you treat an adult with rediculous behavior with respect? man or woman, would you? for example a tenant that destroys your property and refuses to pay for it, or a parent that neglects the safety of their children, or a coworker who is leeching on other's efforts, should they be respected like men just because they have penises? i do not think so ....
I assume you mean "what makes an adult an adult". To which I consider the answer to be personal responsibility. This does not require financial independence, but responsibility does include maintaining commitments, striving to correct errors, and voting each election day.
@LoBornlite@xanga - Ooo, that's a good one too.
@saxy_grrl@xanga - My thoughts exactly. I praise your awareness.
@SomethingAboutKaren@xanga - Yeah, I'm probably gonna steal that, too...
this is a good question. the question could also be, what make a man, "a man of God"- good idea, i will post it up as my question.
I think you've covered the main qualities.
My boyfriend is someone who demonstrates these all the time. He's a very faithful Christian. No one and nothing has stopped him from second-guessing his faith. Generosity: He's always putting others first, helping whenever he can, sometimes giving up his own work to make sure others aren't in pain. Humility: If he's done something good, or something that deserves credit, he'll say thank you, and that'll be the end of it. He doesn't flaunt. Ever. Wisdom: You mentioned something on acquiring the most 'toys'. He may be rich, but you'd never guess it. He always says it was never his choice, which is true, and he also said that if one of his friends, lovers were in pain because of him, money could never hide it. It doesn't equal happiness. Love: Out of all that are listed, I believe this is huge. A man should not be afraid to show he cares. He should be sensitive towards others feelings, in a modest way. Thankfully, he demonstrates love in all ways possible. He has no enemies. Everyone is an acquaintance, friend, family or lover to him.
I only realized a few days ago, that he's the most peaceful man I've ever met. He has no anger. Nothing to be worried about. He accepts things as they are, and doesn't try to change them. Thanks for posting this. I've only just re-defined my love for him.
"Manhood" varies from culture to culture and it's a process, not something reached through some ritual or milestone.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this topic.
this is absurd. all it takes for a man to be a man is male anatomy. i believe what you're referring to is a question of humanity,
notof men.