Thursday, 02 October 2008
I was having a discussion with a married friend of mine a few days ago and she was telling me that she really missed her husband (who was out of town for a few days). She then started telling me that sometimes she and her husband use porn and sexual toys. I was a bit taken aback; not because she offended me, but because I didn't feel like hearing the intimate details of her sex life.
I was preparing to change the subject, but then she went on to say that she knows that a lot of Christians have problems with watching porn, but she believes that it's okay for her because the marriage bed is undefiled. She also went on to say that she knew of a pastor who "prescribed" porn as a means of therapy for married couples who were having issues with sexual intimacy. This was not the first time I had heard this argument. A few years back I was casually dating a guy, who also happened to be a pastor, who revealed to me that he watched porn for educational purposes.
At the risk of sounding judgemental, I don't think it's okay. I do understand that the marriage bed is undefiled, and as a single person I really can't relate to the issues that married people deal with, but I've kinda been under the impression that there is a limit. Philippians 4:8 encourages us to think on things that are true, just, lovely and holy...I suppose it's a matter of opinion, but I wouldn't exactly term porn as being "lovely". Why would it be okay to observe people partaking in ungodly behavior...off the bat we're talking fornication at the least?
Secondly, I've seen people become addicted to porn and make a lot of irrational decisions based on that addiction--you're opening the door for lust. What if your partner doesn't want to participate in such behavior? Are you then more tempted to stray, to fall for the wiles of another person who is more brazen with their sexual behavior? I just see porn as causing more problems than what it's worth.
I don't consider myself to be an expert on the subject, and maybe the whole topic is open to interpretation. Again, I'm not trying to be judgemental because I believe God will reveal the right way to handle any situation in His time and people should be subject to their own convictions rather than other people's interpretations of abstract things, but I thought I would open the floor for discussion.
What's your take on this? When (if ever) is it okay for Christians to watch porn?