by miss marigoldGrowing up, and during recent weeks, I've heard the term "wholesome Christian girl" thrown around a lot – sometimes by guys who say they want to date one, sometimes by adults who encourage us frisky young females to be one, and sometimes by girls who doubt that they really are one.
This really got me thinking about the definition of a "wholesome Christian girl." Somehow, the phrase rubs me the wrong way - maybe because I don't like molds or conforming to some collective standard without first being grounded in a Biblical understanding of what it means to be a wholesome Christian person – but what really strikes me are the different ways people interpret that ideal.
I hate to admit it, but my picture of a "wholesome Christian girl" is largely based on stereotypes. The first image my mind conjures when someone brings it up is of someone who wears little/no makeup, dresses head-to-toe in Gap clothing, has long hair, is involved in the praise team, does community service, says "golly" instead of "gosh," watches Gilmore Girls, has never had alcohol, has never been to a bar or a club (and has no desire to visit one, either), never been kissed, has never been on a date alone with a guy, only watches movies that are PG-13 and under, listens to Christian music exclusively, votes Republican, is called to be a pastor's wife/missionary/social worker/elementary school teacher, is an optimist, babysits the neighbor's kids.....
Yeah, so maybe the media and
A Walk to Remember are largely responsible for that picture, so I'd really like to ask everyone what they imagine a wholesome Christian girl is. Of course, the Bible provides a lot of insight: "Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is the be praised," being only one of several references to female character - as are the examples of female Bible characters - but how would you apply those ideals to the culture we live in?
Then of course, I'm sure guys and girls have somewhat different ideas of what a wholesome Christian is like.
Guys and girls, what does a wholesome Christian girl look like? Girls, would you consider yourself one?
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Comments (30)
"says "golly" instead of "gosh"
You gotta be kidding me......
Since when did gosh become a "harsher" word then "golly"? And who on earth says golly anymore? (Well who under 30 says golly anymore, might be a better way to phrase that question).
"never been kissed, has never been on a date alone with a guy,"
?
"votes Republican, is called to be a pastor's wife/missionary/social worker/elementary school teacher,"
???
Your list confuses me. At least you're acknowledging your potential biases, which is commendable. Personally I don't see a biblical bases for many of the things listed.
Wholesome Christian girls...people who go to church 3+ times a week and don't curse. Plus they say grace when they eat and pray every night when they go to sleep. And they always smile. But they frown when you do something wrong and wince at any form of inappropriateness.
You know, that could be everyone, but I wouldn't know, seeing how I'm a badass Christian girl, rather than a wholesome one.
Wholesomeness/purity are matters of the heart. However, the Bible also says that people will be known by their fruit. Purity doesn't look exactly the same on everyone, but I believe it is characterized by a heart that seeks to glorify God rather than self and to serve others. In my view, some of the fruit of purity is modesty, gentleness, and speaking appropriate words, as well as an absence of trying hard to be noticed or to attract in a sexual way. There is a lot of room for individuality within this. I know "wholesome" emo girls whose look is nothing like you described, and I also know "wholesome" girls who wear nothing but skirts. It's a matter of the heart and the attitude, and that comes out in behavior.
Well, wholesome means to be good or healthy. I think in order to be a healthy Christian then you have to watch what you're "eating". So in essence, it's not to say you are perfect but that you are striving to be. Apply a healthy diet to your Christian lifestyle.
Obviously, to eat healthy means to eat lots of fruits and veggies, whole wheat breads, lots of water,etc. You simply don't feel your body with JUNK! In the same way, you fellowship with other Christians, read the bible, prayer, supplication, going to church...and you feel guilty when you do something morally wrong (unhealthy).
Wholesome isn't perfection...only the strive for it. Cursing, surrounding yourself with dirty/bad movies, etc definitely isn't the best approach to wholesomeness.
Proverbs 31? Displays fruits of the Spirit? Matthew 5:3-11 attitude? Realizes she is far from perfect and ask forgiveness? Humble and loving toward others? Patient?
I do believe it is more of heart than dress. Yet, what is in the heart will be displayed in appearance lots of times. Anybody can say anything but do they mean it from the heart? Yet, at times, appearances can lie also? Again, what is said from the heart not just empty words can make a difference. How do they treat others when the others backs are turned?
I think wholesome is great thing for a woman to pursue .... However, wholesome comes from the inside not what is on the outside. One can always create an illusion of who one wants to be by the way the act and dress but it's the heart that matters and as a christian we should always pursue what is good on the inside ... phil 4:8.
I partially agree with your definition and bias of what a wholesome Christian girl is like. However, I think it is very rare to know a true wholesome Christian girl. Many of the things you listed define people from my church group but I don't think they are "wholesome" because they are not sincere in their actions. Many of the things they do and say are to get attention. They want people to tell them how wonderful they think they are and how they want to be just like them because they are such an awesome Christian. I see right through that with these girls...I know they are not being sincere in their actions. There are a select few that ARE sincere, wholesome Christian girls and I would describe them as patient, kind, living by good moral values, knowledgeable on God's word...they don't look the same at all and they don't have the same personality. They just have a few shared characteristics that make them the type of Christian I wish I had the willpower to be.
St. Jeanne d'Arc.
@whataboutbahb@xanga - she's not talking about biblical basis. she's talking about stereotypes present in the church today regarding young women.
In my head, if someone were to set me up with a girl they described as "wholesome," I'd probably run the other way.
interestingly enough, i think people tend to attribute those same stereotypes to "wholesome" Christian guys...
As a young Christian woman I resent the expectations of what a 'wholesome christian woman' is supposed to look like. It ruffles my skirt (so to speak) to think of where these suppositions have come from. I think that the church is mainly responsible for these stereotypes though. I am not blaming the church, but rather admitting that the church has, in a way, noted what is acceptable to do, and much more importantly, what it does not think is acceptable. I do not reflect the above definition of a 'wholesome christian woman'. I am not virginal in the way that i interract with the world, which is something that i think the above definition is suggesting. I hold myself to a high standard, but nothing like the closed off, mindless woman's described here. I think for myself, and do my best to act in a way that pleases my God. I hold tight to the things that scripture points to, realizing that I was not created to live in the shaddow of other christian women. I was made to glorify God, using my gifts and abilities. Individuality is important, otherwise he wouldn't have made us all so different.
I think that being a 'wholesome christian woman' means standing by your faith in Jesus Christ, resting in the promises of God, living in a way that shows others the love of God, being true to whoever it is that God has created you to be, and glorifying him while doing it!
Instead of "wholesome," how about "whole-hearted," wholly devoted to God? Seeking to hallow His Name and be part of His Kingdom plan and having an attitude toward God that says, "Your will be done and not mine." Serving God alone, not God & mammon. The heart treasuring Christ alone and no other. The soul that pants and thirsts for God and longs for His courts.
A wholesome Christian girl. . . hmm. . . I tend to think you have hit the stereotype on the head. I attended a Christian college and didn't really fit into the mold. It was miserable. I think that looked at properly, the fruits that a wholesome Christian girl would show can be found in Galatians - love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness and self-control. There is also that mythical creature - the Proverbs 31 woman (that I can never seem to equal - or even rival). Neither of these passages talks about appearance, but about behavior.
well, i don't think a whole-some christian girl has a look per-se because it's more about behavior than apperances.
i'm really glad that watching Gilmore Girls isn't a requirement for salvation-- i hate that show, lol
Thinking more about it, one who has patience on God to wait on God to send a sincere Christian man that will value her and her faith. This patience may have to wait decades in life for it to happen as she serves the Lord as the Lord leads.
She can watch those in the youth group and college say one thing on Sundays but act very differently with different values when dating. She may not be the popular girl at all due to she will not put out or compromise to date including the guys going to church looking for a conquest, too.
Yet, she trusts the Lord that through the years, she is investing in eternity and spiritual children as she encourages others to the Lord. She knows despite the words that can be said to discourage her, even from her Mother and Sisters, that God loves her and has not forgotten her as He wants His best for her. Yet, she watches her "Christian friends" with empty words at times go through divorces and such realizing that in the long run chosing God has saved her a lot of regrets.
If she can manage to keep her eyes on Jesus and love people despite choices they make and how they can treat her at times so she can encourage those when they do need help after poor choices and finally for some getting real with Jesus instead of going to the motions.
She will have her good and bad days still when she is frustrated and wonders at times but can get her focus on God back before being too destructive. She is far from perfect but she is still honoring God with patience even if she has to wait for decades for God to put a sincere man of faith to minister to others as a team. Patience in faith in God to provide!
Don't get the idea she is sitting in a chair doing nothing but waiting!! There is a hurting world out there than needs encouragment and Jesus to serve Jesus in as He directs her path for decades!!!!!!
I am not wholesome, but I think I would give anything if I could go back and become that way.
I think I would have been a lot happier and it would be a lot easier for me to be spiritual now if I had.
When my parents said "don't chase that life, you'll only be happy for a season" they were so incredibly accurate and wise- but isn't the bible always wise if not at the time, then definitely in retrospect....
I went to an evangelical high school , after a very close and intense basketball game which we won against a cross town rival(non christian school) , there was pandemonium in the gym ,and amid this , there was a group of "wholesome christian girls " trying to incite us to sing "onward christian soldiers ". The song petered out after a few lines because of lack of participants but my perception of these girls remains with me up to now .
@MissMandey@xanga - One of the most wonderful things about God is forgiveness and being able to get back with Him. We can make changes! I like the statement, "This is the first day of the rest of your life."
You can give your life over to Jesus fully as He forgives to cast your sins as far the east is from the west. Us, humans may not be as forgiving and nice as God!!! Yet, it is God that knows our change of heart and life. All our actions are accountable to Him in how we treat others and ourselves. Yet, there can be some consquences left from so past decisions that can be destructive but Jesus will help us through them and at times those weaknesses can become our strengths as we can encourage others as we can relate and give another hope and encouragment too!
Yes, some time may be lost but it is never too late to return to it as long as we are breathing!!! You can go back to it!! God forgives and is waiting. People can be interesting at times but sometimes it was people that help us get where we are at too! Yet, God does not stray from us due to we are the ones that do the straying. Yet, Jesus is waiting like the Father of the Prodigal son with loving arms waiting for any that want to return!!!
Everyone conjures up the idea of Sandy Olsen from Grease, but that was a long time ago (1959, in the movie)
I just think we need young ladies that are not jaded and sexually burnt-out by their 20s. (and that's just the self-described Christian ones)
what really intrigues me, is someone thinks the gilmore girls is a wholesome show, they are not exactly the examples of wholesome I would go with, but in case u missed other repsonse it is a prov 31 women and behavior that is distingushable
I was once the "wholesome Christian girl." Well, perceived to be. I was quiet and well-behaved by all accounts.
Then I decided that life was too short to live up an ideal that really served no one any purpose. I believe in God, and am faithful. But I'm also human.
I live with my fiance, we share a room though we're not married.
I curse.
I get angry.
I enjoy the occasional drink.
I'm still a good person.
You must be whole grain, full of nutrients, minerals and vitamins. You must not be more than 100 calories, and you must not include things like DAIRY.
@Selah315 - I don't think that being a wholesome Christian Girl makes you necessarily the "prize at the fair".
the girl from a walk to remember really gives a clear picture.