No, I'm not very emotional either, maybe for similar reasons as you.  But I think maybe showing some emotion is better.  It's something I need to work on.  By not showing your feelings, you can loose people because they might not know you care.

I think I'm much the same way, so when I do feel strong emotional urges they seem to overwhelm me.  I'm trying to learn how to better handle my eomtions.

I do show emotion and I feel it's the best way to not have it destroy you. I'm sure that you are concerned by showing weakness, but what you bottle up now will even build up and cause catastrophic results in the end. You usually have someone lend you an ear for you to open up your feelings. If you can't find anyone (or no one is willing to listen, which BTW, is selfish of them even though I know it may get repetitive), you can always jot it down in a hand written journal or a private blog. Whatever you do, you just need to get those emotions out because if you don't, it's just going to make you feel worse in the end.

I am showing mine less and less.  I have had a very rough year or two, in which I was very generous in showing my positive emotions and then, after being dreadfully hurt, very forthcoming in my negative and sad emotions, and it only alienated people.  I couldn't really control them at the time, and was going through something really awful and found that, after emerging from the fog, that showing my emotions didn't help me out one bit, either positive or negative emotions.  Most people don't want to see or experience our emotions with us or even really be there for us.  They prefer to have things all at an even keel and on a superficial level.  I was even told by people I loved the most to please stop crying.  So, I have learned to hide them and not say much and cover them up, because people don't seem to like emotions.

it depends.  sometimes i let my thoughts and emotions out and other times i hold them in.  holding them in is bad because it just means that when i finally do let them out it ends up being in a much more emotional manner than would have been if I had just dealt with the emotion to begin with.  There are some things I just have problems expressing and then when everything finally comes rushing out at once with little to no control and that is not a good thing.  i need to learn to deal with some things better.

it depends for me.  i used to be terribly emotional but went through a really emotionally abusive and emotionally draining marriage in my early 20s and that pretty much taught me to keep things inside of myself.  i'm slowly learning to be more open about my emotions but still find it pretty hard to not seem so tough on the outside.

@croftperkins@xanga - What a hellish situation! I can't say I've been through anything like you describe. I pray God will really touch you and comfort you, soon.

I shut my emotions down when I was a kid to protect myself from the pain of my parents' conflict. I found out that I was emotionally crippled when I got married, terrified of conflict. I would get diarrhea attacks when my wife wanted to sit down and talk things out.

(Long story about a failed marriage omitted here.)

Four years ago, I was sitting in church, desperately wanting to hear from God. It was one of those bottom-of-the-barrel times. I was leafing through my Bible, hoping that a verse would jump off the page or something, and then a quiet voice in my head said, "It's time to start feeling your feelings."

That was it. So I did. I started calling my best friend: "Hey, I'm going through this, I'm feeling this way," several times a day. I went through a painfully startling experience, and immediately drove off to see one friend while talking on the phone to another, processing it all.

It didn't solve all my problems, but it was like coming back to life. I can still revert to depression if I want, but it's not my normal state anymore.

oh, i'm reading this book right now.  I'm no where near finished because I just checked it out of the library yesterday, so I can't say if it's spectacular or not yet, but someone may be blessed by it.

"You Can Be Happy No Matter What: Five Principles for Keeping Life in Perspective" by Richard Carlson

it talks about the relationship between our thoughts and emotions, and how our thoughts are interpretations of circumstances, and not really true representations of reality.  In fact, circumstances are neutral and in themselves aren't negative or positive, but it's a person's thoughts about them that make them seem negative or positive and it's those thoughts and the frequency of them that shapes how we feel.  or at least that's how far I've gotten at the moment :)

I barricade my emotions too. I have a hard time expressing them. It's weird, my dad says things like "I love you", "I miss you", and me, the girl, has a hard time saying it back. I'm also a commitment-phobe when it comes to relationships, and I have a long history of running away from them. I'm a runaway bride, except I've never gotten as far as the altar. I'm trying to change this though... it's definitely not godly to be so fearful of relationships. I'm not sure why I am this way... my friends think I need therapy.

"Stoic" is an excellent word for it. My friends always described it as "Vulcan." I even do it for the same reasons - not wanting to appear weak or girly. How do I un-forget how to show them?

i'm incredibly emotional and passionate... i'm just bad at communicating those things, i think? it's the talking part that gets me... i tend to cry a lot. haha

but i completely understand the lazy christian part. absolutely.

That whole thing described me perfectly...

I really don't want to be so closed, but more often than not, I feel like I can't show my emotions or opinions because they don't really matter.

I mean, I'll sit there and cry, and someone will be all like, "Aww... I'm sorry.  Do you want to talk about it?"  and I just... can't.  My brain shuts down and all I can do is stare ahead of me while the person talks to me.  The best I can do is nod my head.  Then I get mad at myself because I can't express what I'm feeling.

I just get so dissapointed in myself...

I think as women we need to embrace that side of ourselves whilst at the same time gain the ability to control and use them correctly.  I think the stigma that girls/women getting emotional need to be given space has caused us to try and keep them hidden away or unwraps so as not to appear weak, but why hide something that makes us uniquely who we are.  I do think emotions can make us strong individuals if we learn to control them correctly.  I'd rather be known as a warm person in control of herself who can offer friendship and care than a cold unapproachable individual who doesn't show any emotion whatsoever.

I'm sure most of us have at one time or another used that emotional side of ourselves to gain something be it sympathy or attention, or even to attack a person and use the emotions card to get away with it. All the wrong ways of using them. 

I tend to hide myself away also, in terms of opening up to people emotionally, but then I've always been a loner, the type of person who enjoys their own company.  But I do like to put myself out there and let people know I care, that they can turn to me if they need to and sometimes feel it would be nice to be able to that myself, be able to turn to others around me and let them know I'm not doing good etc.

You said that you have a heart filled with emotions, remember that God sees that heart, we can't hide anything from him.  I've found in recent months that I'm more focused on concentrating on that relationship with God, that I can't hide anything from him so he's the one person I can totally confide in.  He knows when I'm in strife or hurt and in need and he also knows when I'm happy and on top of things.

I think we should work on those positive emotions which can only make us into stronger people, whilst learning to control the more negative emotions which can drive us to cause harm.